Are you looking for a steady source of income?
Searching for a job with benefits (like pay)? Are you struggling
to work your way through college? Time and time again have you proven
yourself inept at almost any form of skilled labor? If you can answer
yes to any or all of these questions, Monolith Burger wants you!
Monolith Burger franchises throughout the universe are currently hiring
friendly faces (please note, beings without faces will not be discriminated
against in the application process) to man their registers and fry their
Space Spuds. There are currently a number of positions open at your
local Monolith Burger. Come on down and apply!
Other positions that are currently open include:
Monolith Burger is currently seeking
individuals to fill cashier positions in nearly all restaurants.
In order to gain a cashier position, the applicant should display above
average "people skills," as well as be skilled at the art of persuasion.
Furthermore, due to the handling and counting of money this position incurs,
beings with fingers are preferred (please note, beings without fingers
will not be discriminated against in the application process).
Are you a master chef? A culinary
expert? No? Well, Monolith Burger is the place for you!
If you can learn to simply dump all food items into either a twenty-gallon
deep fryer or nuke-o-wave for ten minutes, you have the necessary skills
to become a Monolith Burger cook. After the recent 60 Nanoseconds
report aired that insinuated Monolith Burger cooks were receiving
poisoning from their equipment, hundreds of spots in the Monolith kitchen
have opened up. Jump on now!
Burger Assembly Technician--
Somebody has to help assemble the great taste of each and every Monolith
Burger. Why shouldn't it be you? With a few hours of training
on the MasterBurger 2000, you'll be an expert in burger assembly!
Why, the job is so simple even a human could do it! Several Monolith
Burger restaurants throughout the universe, including the popular Galaxy
Galleria branch, are hiring Burger Assembly Technicians even as we speak.
Rush out and claim this job as your own today!
If you have experience in management
or--better still--a degree in business and economics, perhaps being Assistant
Manager at your local Monolith Burger should be your next career step!
Imagine the prestige of being the Assistant Manager. All customer
complaints will come to rest on your shoulders (please note, beings
without shoulders will not be discriminated against in the application
process). Plus, you get a really nifty hat!
If you're willing to undergo the intense training, you too could be a Monolith
Burger Manager! After spending three years at lovely Monolith Tech,
you too can be prepared to take on the awesome responsibility of managing
your very own Monolith Burger. It will be your job to inspire your
Monolith crew, making sure that they're slinging the best burgers they
can, considering the contents. It's your job to rally the troops
when the chips are down. It's your job to pat a guy on the back when
he does a good job. It's also your job to throw a guy out on his
backside when he's doing a bad one. With new Monolith Burger restaurants
opening throughout the universe daily, there are Manager spots out there
just waiting to be claimed! There are very few vocations in
the known universe that rival the responsibility and rewards of being a
Monolith Burger Manager. Are you up to the challenge?
So, run--don't walk--to your nearest
Monolith Burger and place your application. We'd be proud to have
you as a part of the Monolith Burger family!
Assistant Monolith Burger Webmaster
Monolith Janitorial Service
Back to Monolith Burger!