Desperately seeking Ashley
Posted on March 21, 2004 @ 4:18 pm
Dear Guy Who Has Been Calling For The Past Two Days,
By my count, you have phoned our number twelve times in the past two days — including calls at 2:30 and 7:30 this morning. Each time, I pick up and you grunt into the receiver, “Lemme talk to Ashley.” I then explain that you have the wrong number, you ask me if this is 555-1212, I respond affirmatively, you make an incredulous grunting noise (if such a noise is even possible), and we hang up. Then, you call back approximately an hour later and we repeat the process.
I’ve been thinking this over, and I believe I have broken down our predicament down into two smaller problems:
- You would like to speak with Ashley, and
- Nobody named Ashley lives here.
Might I recommend dialing another number and asking if Ashley is there? I understand that you probably have some reason to believe that you can reach her at our number, but I assure you that your odds of tracking her down are just as good if you simply dial random numbers on the keypad. As much as I have enjoyed getting to know you in the past 48 hours, I am quite certain the outcome will remain unchanged no matter how many more times you call here: no Ashley.
Please consider this proposal and let me know your thoughts on it. Thanks for your time, and best of luck in finding Ashley!
Your friend,
Jess
Posted by Jess | Filed Under Life in a Nutshell |
5 comments so far...
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You are going to feel SO stupid when Ashley Olsen shows up tomorrow and asks for her messages.
I remember calling an Ashley over and over again, as does Jack, Colin, Brandon, and about the entire campus of King College.
Smith for President.
I had this problem once, the person on the other end would not belive me. So later I decided to play along. The next time they phoned I simply said “Uh, sure. Hold on.” I then muted the phone and continued with what I was doing before until the person hung up.
They do get tired of waiting.
Funny. We kept getting someone calling our labor and delivery room looking for someone. Don’t remember the name, but it was funny/taxing when you’re wife is currently in labor.
I like your approach, though. Kudos.
Smith for President…you know, I debated putting a mini-flier in front of those with just the word “Doug”…but never did…sigh…
I agree… Why not just take the call, and say, in your deepest, most Male voice..
“Yea, this is Ashley.. How can I help?”
He’ll stop calling. ASAP.