Read more… or Read more right here… »

“He wants us to move the Island” — definitely a great conclusion to what I felt was a mixed bag of an episode overall. Seeing Richard Alpert and Matthew Abaddon pop up in Locke’s flashback was a fascinating development; the notion that current events on the Island might have been put into motion literally decades ago certainly piques my interest. “Cabin Fever” also confirmed that Christian Shephard is not Jacob (assuming we can trust the presumed-dead physician). Oh, and if the creepy smile on her face is any indication, Claire seems to have officially drunk her dad’s Island Kool-Aid. It feels like a turning point for her character arc, and I’m curious to see where it takes her.

Did anyone else notice that the coversheet for Keamy’s “secondary protocol” (i.e. torch the Island) was emblazoned with the DHARMA logo? Does that mean that Widmore = DHARMA? If so, that means Ben and the Hostiles essentially stole Widmore’s Island out from under him years ago. It would certainly explain their mutual animosity. Very interesting…

Those revelations aside, however, I thought the episode came up short in terms of action. Furthermore, for an episode titled “Cabin Fever,” it was a definite letdown that we didn’t make it inside Jacob’s cabin until about 56 minutes into the episode. And why has Desmond been relegated to standing around in the background while Sayid makes important decisions and people get murdered on the freighter? And why has Michael essentially become a non-factor in the storyline after his “dramatic” return a few episodes back?

Bah, I shouldn’t complain. This season has given us way more good than bad. I’m just cranky ’cause Daniel Faraday didn’t show up this week. I know what will cheer me up. Let’s take a look at my homemade logo for DHARMA’s heretofore unseen subterranean Mexican cuisine research station, the Chalupa (introduced in last week’s Lost-vivor):

 

Wouldn’t that look great on a t-shirt? Now, let’s take a look at the scores!

Locke:   Born: +1 Wait, can I really give someone a point just for being born?: -1 Well, he’s the youngest preemie in hospital history to live. That’s worth something, right?: +1 Hey, remember those Cabbage Patch Kids Preemie dolls from back in the ’80s? Have you ever stopped to think about just how bizarre of a toy that was? “Hey, kids! How would you like your very own premature baby doll?”: -1 D’oh! Where was I? Oh, yeah…Lost-vivor. Here, just take the stupid point, John: +1 Apparently sees dead people. With nosebleeds: +5 Drew what appeared to be a rendering of the Smoke Monster as a child. Creepy: +2 Failed Richard Alpert’s somewhat puzzling test. I totally would have picked the comic book: -2 Found the DHARMA mass grave again: +2 Found Horace’s corpse, recovered the map: +2 Stuffed in a locker. Does that actually happen to people, or is it completely an invention of television and film?: -1 Turned down Mittelos Bioscience’s summer camp. Dude, that could have been your chance to ride in a submarine (assuming you didn’t blow it up first): -1 Found Jacob’s cabin: +5 Unfortunately, Jacob wasn’t home. Isn’t that just the story of Locke’s life?: -1   Net gain/loss: +12 Current score: 134
Jack:   Not following doctor’s orders: -1 Still, he seemed to be getting around rather well for a recent victim — er, “recipient” of sketchy Island surgery: +2   Net gain/loss: +1 Current score: 118
Ben:   You know things are bad when Ben is following Hurley: -1 Got a little whiny with the whole “I used to be the Chosen One” bit: -1 Line of the night: “Destiny is a fickle bitch.” What a coincidence! So is Kate: +1   Net gain/loss: -1 Current score: 144
Claire:   Joined Team Christian, seemed rather blasé about Aaron’s whereabouts. Isn’t this the same chick who spent the last three seasons wailing like a banshee every time the kid got so much as a runny nose?: -6   Net gain/loss: -6 Current score: 88
Sayid:   Rushed in to wake up Desmond and inform him of the chopper’s return. Once again, Sayid doesn’t sleep; he waits: +1 Hatched plan to evacuate Island, escaped on raft: +4   Net gain/loss: +5 Current score: 136
Michael:   Stomped on by Keamy: -2 Michael’s magic “I-can’t-die-yet” powers caused Keamy’s pistol to jam: +5   Net gain/loss: +3 Current score: 82
Desmond:   Decided to stick around on the H.M.S. Penny’s Father’s Boat. I know the Island kinda sucks, but have you noticed the tendency of people on the freighter to go batshit insane? I’d disembark at my first opportunity: -2   Net gain/loss: -2 Current score: 113
Hurley:   Actually bothered asking Ben about the Purge. Asking questions that matter is always worth a few points: +2 Distributed water to Ben and Locke. It’s always important to stay hydrated when going in search of a mysterious disappearing jungle cabin: +1 Shared his candy bar with Ben. It’s like one of those “Not going anywhere for a while?” ads for Snickers come to life: +1   Net gain/loss: +4 Current score: 115
Frank:   Piloted chopper back to the ship. He’s getting pretty good at that whole “Bearing 305″ thing: +2 Dropped off the homing doohickey for the Losties on the beach. I’m not sure what he’s planning, but let’s hope Keamy doesn’t find out: +3   Net gain/loss: +5 Current score: 126

 

Eleven weeks down, just a few more rounds of Lost-vivor to go. Here are your updated standings:

1. Ben (144) (-1)
2. Daniel (144)
3. Sayid (136) (+5)
4. Locke (134) (+12)
5. Sawyer (130)
6. Frank (126) (+5)
7. Juliet (125)
8. Jack (118) (+1)
9. Hurley (115) (+4)
10. Desmond (113) (-2)
11. Sun (112)
12. Bernard (110)
13. Vincent (109)
14. Kate (109)
15. Jin (109)
16. Charlotte (102)
17. Rose (100)
18. Miles (96)
19. Claire (88) (-6)
20. Michael (82) (+3)

 
Well, well, well…it appears we have a tie for first place between Ben and Daniel. Meanwhile, check out the slew of Lost-vivors within striking distance of the number one spot: Sayid, Locke, Sawyer. Even Frank and Juliet aren’t out of the running yet. It looks like this season is going to go down to the wire. Anyone care to make a prediction on the winner?

That just about wraps up this week’s installment of Lost-vivor. As always, feel free to comment below. Thanks for reading, and I’ll see you next time!

« Hide it

Read more… or Read more right here… »

“Something Nice Back Home” wasn’t exactly an action-packed extravaganza, but I imagine it was a real treat for all the Jack/Kate ’shippers out there. That being said, I guess I’m glad Jack is still alive, and it was a pleasant change to see Juliet step up to the plate and do the whole doctor thing (considering she’s been somewhat underutilized this season).

I’m curious to see where the Christian Shepherd storyline is going — both on and off the Island. I wonder if Jack’s whole “get my father down here” rant from the Season Three finale wasn’t as nutty as it initially sounded. Factor in Christian’s appearance in Jacob’s cabin earlier this season, and I imagine things are about to get very interesting.

Meanwhile, I’m definitely enjoying the development of Sawyer’s character. Seeing him stand up for Hurley last week and take such a protective attitude toward Claire this week is a welcome turn of events. I’m sure Lost purists are filling up the message boards right now, demanding the return of the guy who used to horde asthma inhalers back in Season One, but I think his evolution makes sense in the context of his recent Island experiences (especially the attack on Othersville).

Anyway, I thought it was an okay episode — nothing earth-shattering, but a decent hour of television nevertheless. Let’s take a look at this week’s scores…

Jack:   Ew…Jack’s all sweaty and gross: -1 Passed out again, face-planted on the beach. Hey, I wonder if the “sickness” that Rousseau used to rattle on about was just ordinary appendicitis all along. If so, the whole “murdering her crewmates” thing seems like overkill in hindsight: -1 Slept in, late to an appointment: -1 Jack wears panties now? And he has Star Wars toys scattered around his house? I never realized how much the two of us have in common: -1 Oh, wait — he’s living with Kate. Way to go, Jack: +5 And he’s reading Alice in Wonderland to Aaron. And getting mucho kissy-face from Kate: +3 Failed to convince Juliet that he was suffering from food poisoning. It was an obvious lie; after all, DHARMA shut down its subterranean Taco Bell station (”The Chalupa”) last October: -1 Cooked up the crazy mirror scheme so he could watch his own surgery. If only he had tried to do it himself. As I said last week, that would have been worth fifty points at least: +2 Asked Kate to marry him; she said yes: +10 Stayed conscious for a solid minute his surgery. That’s not too bad considering using lidocaine as a local anesthetic for an appendectomy is like crunching up a few children’s aspirins and rubbing them on your stomach before cutting it open with a rusty steak knife: +3 Survived the surgery: +10 Saw his dad, who may or may not actually be there: -3 Hey, I’m pretty sure that combining your anti-anxiety medication with six or seven beers is contraindicated: -5 Got a little emotionally abusive toward Kate, still jealous of Sawyer: -4 And thus begins Jack’s descent into a drugged-up, suicidal, blubbering mess: -6   Net gain/loss: +10 Current score: 117
Daniel:   Totally called out Charlotte on her “attitude”: +1 Volunteered to go to the medical station, found all the junk on Juliet’s list: +2   Net gain/loss: +3 Current score: 144
Claire:   Wandered off into the jungle with Christian Shepherd, seemingly abandoned Aaron: -7   Net gain/loss: -7 Current score: 94
Sawyer:   Bestowed nickname on Miles (”Donger”): +1 Check out Mr. Caretaker, looking after Claire and Aaron: +2 Issued a Mysterious Island Restraining Order against Miles on Claire’s behalf: +2 Slept through Christian’s nocturnal visit and Claire’s departure. In Sawyer’s defense, he was probably plumb tuckered out from running around like an action hero back at Othersville: -2   Net gain/loss: +3 Current score: 130
Miles:   Apparently hears dead people, found Rousseau and Karl: +4 Targeted by Sawyer’s restraining order. Wait a second…doesn’t Sawyer need Mayor Locke’s approval to do something like that? Or is the jungle under Tribal Chief Jack’s jurisdiction?: -2   Net gain/loss: +2 Current score: 96
Bernard:   All up in Daniel’s grill: +2 Served as anesthesiologist for Jack’s surgery. Appeared disturbingly comfortable applying chloroform-soaked rag: +3   Net gain/loss: +5 Current score: 110
Charlotte:   Speaks Korean. Sure, why not?: +2   Net gain/loss: +2 Current score: 102
Hurley:   Stopped taking meds, isn’t sleeping. Looks more nutso than the last time we saw him: -3 On the plus side, he’s still getting visits from the Ghost Hobbit: +1   Net gain/loss: -2 Current score: 111
Jin:   Noticed Daniel has a crush on Charlotte: +1 Figured out that Charlotte speaks Korean. Very observant: +2 Brokered a deal to get Sun off the Island: +5 Then again, I’m not sure Charlotte is exactly the “go-to person” for these kinds of matters: -3   Net gain/loss: +5 Current score: 109
Juliet:   Remembered she was a doctor, started caring for Jack: +1 Saw through Jack’s clever food poisoning ruse: +1 Took charge of the camp; sent Losties off to boil water, fetch clean towels. That’s an OB/GYN joke. Well, kinda: +4 Doesn’t know precisely where to make the incision. Don’t worry, Jack; if your appendix is inflamed enough, it should be easy to find once she’s in there: -2 Successfully pulled off the surgery, saved Jack’s life: +10 Offered Jack back to Kate. My theory? Jack is a horrible kisser: +2   Net gain/loss: +16 Current score: 125
Frank:   Thought fast, told Sawyer and company to hide in the jungle: +3 Distracted Keamy when Aaron started crying. Stupid babies: +2   Net gain/loss: +5 Current score: 121
Rose:   Bestowed nickname on Charlotte (”Red”): +1 Correctly pointed out that Jack shouldn’t be getting sick on the Island. If anything, he should be growing a second appendix: +2   Net gain/loss: +3 Current score: 100
Sun:   Remembered where the medical station was: +4   Net gain/loss: +4 Current score: 112
Kate:   Since I didn’t give Kate any points for her fancy house the last time we saw it, consider this catching up: +2 Drafted as Juliet’s nurse: +1 Subsequently kicked out of the operating tent: -1 Accepted Jack’s marriage proposal: +10 Unfortunately, her financé is a pill-popping, self-loathing, hallucinating alcoholic: -5   Net gain/loss: +7 Current score: 109

 

Ten weeks down, just a few more rounds of Lost-vivor to go. Here are your updated standings:

1. Ben (145)
2. Daniel (144) (+3)
3. Sayid (131)
4. Sawyer (130) (+3)
5. Juliet (125) (+16)
6. Locke (122)
7. Frank (121) (+5)
8. Jack (117) (+10)
9. Desmond (115)
10. Sun (112) (+4)
11. Hurley (111) (-2)
12. Bernard (110) (+5)
13. Vincent (109)
14. Kate (109) (+7)
15. Jin (109) (+5)
16. Charlotte (102) (+2)
17. Rose (100) (+3)
18. Miles (96) (+2)
19. Claire (94) (-7)
20. Michael (79)

 
While Ben maintained a very narrow lead over Daniel, there were some shakeups further down the scoreboard worth noting this week. Juliet posted major gains thanks to her successful surgery, and Jack didn’t do too bad for himself either by surviving the ordeal. It’s also worth mentioning that Frank Lapidus has somehow crept into seventh place over the past few episodes — and is now in easy striking distance of the top three. Could he be this season’s Lost-vivor dark horse?

That just about wraps up this week’s installment of Lost-vivor. As always, feel free to comment, complain, or offer your predictions below. Thanks for reading, and I’ll see you next time!

« Hide it

Read more… or Read more right here… »

From what I can gather around the Web, the general consensus on “The Shape of Things to Come” can be summed up in two words: “holy” and “crap.” And I agree wholeheartedly. This was definitely a wild episode — from Ben’s trek through time and space to an amped-up appearance by the Smoke Monster to Alex’s somewhat shocking death. I have no idea where Lost is going next at this point, and I’m loving it.

Did Ben kill Nadia? That’s not how I interpreted his smirk after recruiting Sayid in the future. No, I suspect Sayid saw exactly what Ben wanted him to see and reacted exactly as Ben wanted him to react (i.e. joining Ben in his quest against Charles Widmore). That seems more like Ben’s style.

Does Ben control the Smoke Monster? Again, I’m not so sure. He may have unleashed it, but I didn’t get the impression he could necessarily control it. After all, Ben seemed a little scared of Smokey himself as it ripped through the camp.

I think I’ll cut my opening thoughts a little short this week and jump straight to the scoring. Let’s roll!

Ben:   Dressing in layers is one thing, but a fur-lined parka in the Tunisian desert seems a little like overkill: -1 Tossed his cookies, has a nasty cut on his arm: -2 Of course, I’m overlooking the fact that Ben apparently teleported halfway around the world: +8 Disarmed one Bedouin, shot the other, then knocked out the first one with the rifle butt. Okay, that’s pretty badass: +5 Oh, and he apparently speaks Arabic and Turkish, too: +1 Did I mention he can play piano?: +1 Or that he has a shotgun in his piano bench?: +1 Bestowed nickname on himself (”Dean Moriarty”): +1 Doesn’t know the year: -1 Of course, that more or less confirms that Ben is traveling through frickin’ time: +10 Spotted by Sayid while taking photos: -1 Knows everything there is to know about Widmore’s mercenary, Keamy: +1 Let Alex die (after saying some pretty nasty stuff about how he didn’t care about her): -20 Has a secret room inside his other secret room. How cool is that?: +2 Recruited Sayid in the future: +3 Called in the Smoke Monster. Or let it in. I’m not really sure: +7 Confronted Widmore in the future, promised to avenge Alex: +3   Net gain/loss: +18 Current score: 145
Daniel:   Used some chicken wire and duct tape to get a signal out of the sat phone. He’s a regular MacGruber (“Making life-saving inventions out of household materials!”): +4 Knows Morse code: +1 Used his knowledge of Morse code for deception. Hey, that’s a violation of the Telegrapher’s Oath! Is nothing sacred?: -2   Net gain/loss: +3 Current score: 141
Claire:   Claire done got blowed up: -100 Wait, no…she’s still alive: +103   Net gain/loss: +3 Current score: 101
Locke:   Looks like it’s splitsville for Team Locke: -3   Net gain/loss: -3 Current score: 122
Sawyer:   Bestowed nickname on Hurley (”Chicken Little”): +1 Launched a successful attack on Siberia: +1 Bestowed nickname on Rousseau (”Frenchy”): +1 Check out Action Hero Sawyer! Running around, shooting at people, dodging gunfire, using a picnic table for cover, narrowly avoiding exploding buildings. Not bad: +5 Ended up with a nasty bloodstain on his shirt. Fortunately, it came from some random Lostie and nobody we actually cared about: -1 Led the anti-Locke rebellion in the jungle. It’s about time somebody wised up: +2   Net gain/loss: +9 Current score: 127
Miles:   Freed by Widmore’s mercenaries: +2 Rang the doorbell at Ben’s cabin. That what I call good manners: +1   Net gain/loss: +1 Current score: NA
Vincent:   Found Doc Ray’s corpse (of course, Bernard tried to take all the credit): +3   Net gain/loss: +3 Current score: 109
Sayid:   Reunited with Nadia, married his one true love: +27 Until she was murdered, that is: -30 Spotted Ben taking photographs from the rooftop in Tikrit. Sayid is so awesome, he could probably smell what brand of camera Ben was using: +2 Wait, is Sayid…crying? That can’t be right, can it?: -1 Killed Widmore’s assassin, avenged Nadia’s death: +6 Something about Ben’s self-satisfied smirk tells me that Sayid should look for a new boss: -2   Net gain/loss: +2 Current score: 131
Desmond:   “What do ye mean Ben is gonna try to kill my girlfriend in the future to get revenge on her father who had some guy on his boat kill the kid Ben stole from some crazy French lady who shipwrecked years ago on the mysterious Island in the middle of nowhere, brotha?”: -1   Net gain/loss: -1 Current score: 115
Bernard:   Knows Morse code, used knowledge to expose Daniel’s lies: +3   Net gain/loss: +3 Current score: 105
Jack:   Good news, Jack! A job just opened up for a physician on the H.M.S. Penny’s Father’s Boat: +1 Suffering from a mysterious stomach bug: -1 Got tough with Daniel after he lied about the transmission: +3 Uh-oh…appendicitis. I’ll totally give Jack 50 points if he operates on himself next week. How cool would that be?: -5   Net gain/loss: -2 Current score: 107
Hurley:   Get the baby away from the window, Hurley: -1 Hurley! Seriously, get the baby away from the window: -1 Dammit, Hurley, stop waving the baby around in front of the window: -1 Ignored Ben’s orders, let Claire and Sawyer into the cabin anyway: +2 Ended up stuck with Team Locke during the jungle mutiny: -1   Net gain/loss: -2 Current score: 113
Alex:   Taken hostage by Widmore’s mercenaries: -4 Tripped the failsafe while deactivating the sonic fence, initiated Code 14J: +3 Executed by Keamy, presumably dead: -100   Net gain/loss: -101 Current score: NA

 

After nine pulse-pounding weeks of Lost-vivor, here are your updated standings:

1. Ben (145) (+18)
2. Daniel (141) (+3)
3. Sayid (131) (+2)
4. Sawyer (127) (+9)
5. Locke (122) (-3)
6. Frank (116)
7. Desmond (115) (-1)
8. Hurley (113) (-2)
9. Juliet (109)
10. Vincent (109) (+3)
11. Sun (108)
12. Jack (107) (-2)
13. Bernard (105) (+3)
14. Jin (104)
15. Kate (102)
16. Claire (101) (+3)
17. Charlotte (100)
18. Rose (97)
19. Miles (94) (+3)
20. Michael (79)

 
Wow! After a crazy week, Ben catapults from third into first place. Sawyer also posted big gains this week, moving up a few notches in the rankings. Beyond that, there were not other major shakeups this week (unless you count Vincent officially eclipsing Jack in the rankings).

That’s it for this week’s slightly-delayed installment of Lost-vivor. As always, feel free to comment, complain, or offer your predictions below. Thanks for reading, and I’ll see you next time.

« Hide it

It seems a little silly in retrospect, but I actually conjured up the name “Lost-vivor” and designed the logo several months before I had any idea what Lost-vivor was going to be. I was watching Survivor one Thursday, and it occurred to me that two of my favorite television shows — Survivor and Lost — were both set on jungle islands in the middle of nowhere. It would certain lighten the mood on Lost, I mused, if the castaways had the occasional reward challenge to take their minds off their ongoing struggle with the Others. This unholy hybrid could be called Lost-vivor.
 
From there, I designed — well, appropriated — the logo using my limited Photoshop skills. Then, the finished logo sat on my hard drive for the next few months. I didn’t really have a purpose in mind for it when I created the image; it was more for my own amusement than anything else. As Season Three of Lost approached, however, it occurred to me that Lost-vivor was such a goofy name that it would be a shame not to share it with the people who read my blog. So, I devised an idea to go along with the logo. My inspiration was combining the competitive element of Survivor with the meticulous scorekeeping of fantasy football — while adding a healthy (unhealthy?) dose obsessive TV geekiness. Thus was born Lost-vivor.
 
 

I’m often asked if I “liveblog” Lost-vivor — i.e. actually write the recap while I’m watching the episode. Sadly, I’m not capable of multitasking quite that well. Instead, I print out a scorecard each week that lists all the characters on Lost. Each character has a column marked with a “+” where I jot down (with my favorite green pen) everything that I think deserves points to be awarded and a second column marked with a “-” for point deductions. After the episode ends, I sit down at my computer and start sorting out all the pluses and minuses. Then, I assign actual point values, try to throw in a few jokes, and then finally write my overview of the episode that precedes the scoring section. Within a couple of hours (maybe longer if I need to create several new character portraits to go along with the recap), I’m ready to post the finished product.
 
 

Much like the comedy series Whose Line Is It Anyway?, Lost-vivor is a game where everything’s made up and the points don’t matter. That being said, I try to remain at least somewhat consistent in assigning points from week to week. When I’m awarding or deducting points sheerly for the purpose of making a joke, I try to never assign more than one point. Actions that move along the plot, demonstrate particularly clever (or dumb) decision-making skills, or otherwise seem significant for whatever reason receive between two and five points. Values between five and ten typically recognize actions upon which the storyline of a given episode hinges — the kind of thing that’s likely to have repercussions in future episodes. Finally, point values above ten are reserved for truly awesome, unexpected actions (good or bad) — e.g. getting shot, saving someone’s life, blowing up a Hatch, being Sayid, etc.
 
Before you go back and start re-scoring past installments of Lost-vivor, I will note that these are only rules of thumb. I probably violate them several dozen times per week (at least). I’m here for the jokes, not the points.
 
 

I don’t hate Jack. In fact, Jack was probably my favorite character throughout Seasons One and Two. I thought it was freakin’ awesome that he emerged as a leader immediately after the crash, and I was firmly in Jack’s camp during the whole “man of science, man of faith” debate with Locke in Season Two. By the third season, however, it seemed like the writers were making Jack so lovesick over Kate, so prone to paradoxical extremes of both arrogance and self-doubt, so naive…pretty soon, the character that made me enjoy Lost so much in the first place was almost unrecognizable. Much the same could be said about elements of Locke’s development since the first season.
 
From a storytelling standpoint, I realize that Jack is undergoing the familiar “hero’s journey” made famous by Joseph Campbell. The trials, tribulations, and self-doubt are just part of the process, and I’m certain we’ll see Jack redeemed before the series ends. In the long term, that’s great for Jack fans; in the short run, however, it has cost him more than a few Lost-vivor points. Trust me, though — when Jack turns things around (as he’s already shown hints of doing this season), I’ll happily award him his fair share of points.
 
 

That’s a tough question, considering the value of hindsight in these matters. Gut instinct? I’ll say Jack would have barely edged out Locke for Season One, whereas Mr. Eko would have taken the crown in Season Two.
 
 

That one’s easy. It’s because she’s French. Okay, not really. Call it an oversight that’s turned into a running joke over time.
 
 

Read more… or Read more right here… »

Sorry about the delay in posting this week’s recap. I was off on a brief adventure in San Diego and didn’t have a chance to watch “Meet Kevin Johnson” until after I returned Saturday night. That being said, I thought it was a fairly underwhelming episode (at least compared to the rest of Season Four). Michael’s uninterrupted flashback seemed to drag a bit; I wish they had broken it up with more “present day” scenes scattered throughout the episode. Also, it might have been nice if Michael’s flashback included a few more revelations about Michael and Walt’s actual escape from the Island. What’s so special about Bearing 325? Were they eventually picked up by another ship and brought back to the mainland? How did Michael explain their return to his mother? In my opinion, a little less “suicidal Michael” and a little more “rescuing-my-boy Michael” would have improved the episode.

It was great seeing Tom again; I’ve missed the guy since he was killed last season. Plus, his appearance in New York adds some interesting wrinkles to the Lost timeline. If Lostpedia is to be believed, Michael and Walt left the Island at the end of Season Two on Day 67. Then, we saw Jack and Tom playing football in Otherville somewhere on Day 80. Naomi parachuted down to the Island on Day 87, Tom and the Others’ assaulted the beach on Day 92, and Tom was killed on Day 93. If Naomi arrived on Day 87, that means that Michael was contacted by Tom (between games of two-hand touch and assaults on the beach) and posted on the freighter less than twenty days after leaving the Island. Of course, all this assumes that time off the Island works the same as time on the Island — which it almost certainly doesn’t. Still, it’s food for thought.

Let’s see…other news from “Meet Kevin Johnson.” Karl’s dead? Meh. I’m surprised it took this long. Rousseau’s shot? I have a feeling she’ll pull through; there are still too many unanswered questions about her time on the Island.

Okay, enough of my rambling. Let’s get this week’s scoring underway:

Michael:   Slammed against the bulkhead by Sayid…and with good reason. I can forgive working with the Others and killing Ana Lucia. But, Libby? I liked Libby: -2 Apparently, Bearing 325 sets a direct course for a crappy post-Island apartment: -2 Wow, Michael is a really bad driver. I mean, he ran right into that giant shipping crate: -6 Survived crash: +3 Visited by Libby in the hospital, offered an extra blanket: +1 Unfortunately, Libby turned out to be a ghost. And the blanket? Probably just an ectoplasmic projection (one assumes): -1 Chewed out by his mom, forbidden to see Walt. SHE TOOK HIS BOY!!! WAAAALT!!!: -3 Pawned Jin’s Rolex watch. Oh, man…Mr. Paik is gonna be pissed: -2 Ready to take second crack at suicide: -3 Life saved by Tom: +2 At whom Michael shoots (and misses): -1 Disarmed by Tom: -1 Whacked Tom with a champagne bottle: +1 Apparently, the Island won’t let him kill himself. I guess that means Michael survives at least a few more episodes before his inevitable redemptive sacrifice: +4 Agreed to work with the Others. Couldn’t he have at least negotiated for a better alias?: -1 Recognized Naomi’s accent: +1 Uh-oh…I guess that briefcase bomb means Michael is on a suicide mission for the Others: -3 Despite the best efforts of the ghosts of both Libby and Mama Cass, Michael detonates the bomb anyway: -3 Hey, it turns out it wasn’t a bomb after all! That Ben…such a kidder: +2 Got a crank call from some jerk pretending to be his son: -1 Roughed up a little more by Sayid, exposed to Captain Gault. Luckily for Michael, the Captain seems like a reasonable, forgiving type of guy: -5   Net gain/loss: -20 Current score: 79
Sayid:   Wore his shoes to bed. Much like Chuck Norris, Sayid does not sleep…he waits: +1 Confronted Michael about his true identity and purpose on the boat…above deck and in view of several crew members. Usually, Sayid is a little more subtle than that: -2 Roughed up Michael: +1 Roughed up Michael some more. Apparently, Sayid was just as bored by Michael’s 45-minute flashback as I was: +2 Exposed Michael to Captain Gault. Hmm…as much as I enjoy awarding you points, Sayid, I’m not sure if I can go along with this one. I know Michael and Ben aren’t your favorite people, but is now really the time to give up the tactical advantage of having an inside man on the boat?: -5   Net gain/loss: -3 Current score: 129
Ghost Libby:   Brought Michael a nice warm blanket in the hospital: +1 Unsuccessful in her attempt to stop Michael from detonating the bomb: -5 But, it turns out it wasn’t really a bomb in the first place: +2   Net gain/loss: -2 Current score: NA
Tom:   Stopped Michael from committing suicide: +2 Avoided being shot by Michael at virtually point blank range. It reminds me of the good old days when the Others seemed to have almost superhuman abilities: +3 Disarmed Michael: +1 Whacked in the head with a champagne bottle: -2 Figured out that Michael told Walt about Ana Lucia and Libby: +1 Has a penthouse suite: +3 After hints had been dropped here and there in previous episodes, it’s finally revealed that Tom is gay. I’m proud of the Lost writing staff on this one: +5 Knew about Widmore and the fake Flight 815: +2 Successfully recruited Michael: +2 Sadly, he’s still dead: -17   Net gain/loss: 0 Current score: NA
Karl:   Ambushed, shot, and killed en route to the Temple: -100   Net gain/loss: -100 Current score: NA
Rousseau:   Took a much-needed shower at some point after taking up residence in Lockeville: +2 Ambushed on her way to the Temple. What happened to her vaunted jungle survival skills?: -4 Shot by unseen assailant. I guess that whole “wait until the count of three and run” plan didn’t work out so well: -15   Net gain/loss: -17 Current score: NA
Locke:   Called a Lockeville town meeting, proclaimed “no more secrets”: +5 Continued to keep at least a few secrets. I guess that’s his executive privilege as mayor of Lockeville: -3   Net gain/loss: +2 Current score: 125
Ben:   Spilled the beans to all of Lockeville about Michael being his man on the boat. I’m perplexed by Ben’s increasingly forthcoming nature: +1 Sent Alex to the Temple to ensure her safety. In all fairness, he didn’t say anything about keeping Karl or Danielle safe: +1 Apparently has a conscience, unwilling to kill everyone on the H.M.S. Penny’s Father’s Boat. So, does that mean all the members of DHARMA who died in the purge had it coming?: +3   Net gain/loss: +5 Current score: 127
Alex:   Ambushed in the jungle along with Rousseau and Karl: -4 Survived ambush unharmed (unless you count the psychological trauma of having your boyfriend killed and your mom seriously wounded, if not dead): +2   Net gain/loss: -2 Current score: NA

 

After eight weeks of Lost-vivor, here are your updated standings:

1. Daniel (138)
2. Sayid (129) (-3)
3. Ben (127) (+5)
4. Locke (125) (+2)
5. Sawyer (118)
6. Desmond (116)
7. Frank (116)
8. Hurley (115)
9. Jack (109)
10. Juliet (109)
11. Sun (108)
12. Vincent (106)
13. Jin (104)
14. Kate (102)
15. Bernard (102)
16. Charlotte (100)
17. Claire (98)
18. Rose (97)
19. Miles (93)
20. Michael (79) (-20)

 
Ouch! It’s a tough week for our friend Kevin Johnson, as Michael drops to the bottom of the rankings faster than a suicidal Kahana crewman wrapped in chains. Meanwhile, the ever-elusive Ben adds a few points to his total and moves into third place. With five episodes remaining this season, it looks like we’ll have several solid contenders for the top spot.

That wraps up this week’s slightly-delayed installment of Lost-vivor. As always, feel free to comment, complain, or offer your predictions below. Thanks for reading, and I’ll see you next time.

« Hide it

Read more… or Read more right here… »

Michael’s return? Even without the benefit of spoilers, I kinda saw that coming. After all, Harold Perrineau has been listed in the opening credits all season long. The fact that Jin’s story was a flashback intercut with Sun’s flash forward, however, took me totally by surprise. In fact, I’d say it’s one of the bigger curveballs Lost has thrown this season, and it just goes to show how many intriguing storytelling avenues have been opened up by tinkering with the series’ flashback formula.

Overall, I felt that “Ji Yeon” continued to build upon a string of solid episodes for Lost, and I have to admit that I find Sun and Jin’s story rather touching at this point. Of course, now I’m curious if next week’s episode (”Meet Kevin Johnson”) will fill in a few blanks about how Michael ended up working for Ben — not to mention how he got posted on the freighter. And why shouldn’t we trust the captain?

Okay, let’s take a look at this week’s scores:

Jin:   “Let’s talk about baby names.” “Can you pass the cereal?” Is it just me, or did Jin’s English skills improve dramatically sometime between Seasons Three and Four?: +3 He’s one of the Oceanic Six: +5 Bought a pretty awesome stuffed panda for his kid: +3 Cell phone knocked out of his hand, run over: -2 Cab stolen: -2 Along with his giant stuffed panda: -2 Dropped what appeared to be an obscene amount of money on a replacement panda. Let’s see, if a single South Korean won is worth .001031 US dollars, and Jin laid out at least a few 10,000-won bills…aw, screw it. If there’s anything I’ve proven during the course of Lost-vivor, it’s that math isn’t my strong suit. Let’s just say he overpaid: -1 Found out Sun cheated on him. I’m granting an official Lost-vivor Sympathy Point: +1 Caught a fish (despite Bernard’s endless yapping): +1 Forgave Sun. It’s a testament to just how much Jin has grown as a character when you compare him to the abusive jerk who wouldn’t let his wife take off her sweater in front of the other Losties back in Season One: +6 Missed his daughter’s birth: -4 Hold the phone…Jin was actually rushing to make it to someone else’s birth? And he’s only been married for two months? So, Jin was having a flashback while Sun was having a flash forward? I didn’t see that coming. On the bright side, I guess he hasn’t missed his daughter’s birth…at least not yet: +4 Jin’s dead?! Say what?: -100 His tombstone says he died on September 22, 2004…meaning he supposedly perished in the crash of Flight 815. So you’re telling me he’s not even one of the Oceanic Six anymore?: -5 But he’s still alive on the Island. So, I guess I shouldn’t deduct that 100 points yet: +100 Thanks a lot, Jin. Your future death officially broke Lost-vivor. I hope you’re happy: -2   Net gain/loss: +5 Current score: DOES NOT COMPUTE! DOES NOT COMPUTE! <bzzt!> <pop!>
Desmond:   “Ye can toss me in the brig, brotha, but ye canna make me eat lima beans”: -2 Took notice of Regina’s impending suicide: +2 Demanded some answers from the captain. As always, I’m here to provide positive reinforcement on those rare occasions when Losties ask intelligent, relevant questions: +5 Downgraded to cabin with cockroaches, bloodstain: -2   Net gain/loss: +3 Current score: 116
Juliet:   Caught Sun rifling through her tent: +1 Exposed Sun’s affair to Jin. Man, that’s cold: -7 To Juliet’s credit, however, she seems to genuinely care about Sun…in a “I’m more than happy to wreck your marriage” kind of way: +1   Net gain/loss: -5 Current score: 109
Kate:   Talked trash about Juliet to Sun. Jealous much, Kate?: -1 Drew Sun a map of the Island. Okay, that’s fairly impressive: +4   Net gain/loss: +3 Current score: 102
Sun:   She’s one of the Oceanic Six: +5 Uh-oh…looks like she’s encountered some complications with her pregnancy: -3 Demanded answers from Daniel (”Are you here to rescue us?”). Way to go, Sun!: +4 Doesn’t trust Juliet. I honestly can’t blame her: +1 Considered defecting to Team Locke. I know Team Jack looks a little shaky right now, but trust me — Team Locke is going downhill fast: -3 Caught rifling through Juliet’s tent: -2 Fell prey to the familiar “your usual obstetrician is out of town” television birth cliché: -1 Ratted out by Juliet concerning her affair: -5 Decided against Team Locke after all. A wise choice: +3 Delivered a healthy baby girl: +8   Net gain/loss: +7 Current score: 108
Jack:   Actually acted like a doctor, asked Sun about her pregnancy: +1   Net gain/loss: +1 Current score: 109
Michael:   Hey, Michael’s back: +5 Oh, and since Lost-vivor wasn’t around back in Season Two, here’s a little something from me to you — just my way of saying thanks for all those times you ran around screaming “THEY TOOK MY BOY!!!” back in the day: -3 Oops! Almost forgot…Kevin Johnson? You’ve had all this time to think up an alias, and the best you could do is steal one from a former Phoenix Suns point guard?: -3   Net gain/loss: -1 Current score: 99
Bernard:   Butted in on Sun and Jin’s argument. Way to go, Captain Awkward: -1 Dispensed a few of his patented words of wisdom for Jin. At least I assume they were words of wisdom; I stopped paying attention when he started talking: +2   Net gain/loss: +1 Current score: 102
Regina:   Hey, Regina is being played by Death Proof’s Zoe Bell: +2 Who’s apparently illiterate or something: -3 Oh, wait. It doesn’t matter. She committed suicide: -99   Net gain/loss: -100 Current score: NA
Sayid:   Thrown in brig with Desmond: -2 Accepted the lima beans. Yes…protein will be essential for the escape plan I assume you’re hatching: +1 Sought answers from the captain. Yet again, it’s encouraging when these people bother asking the right questions: +5 Recognized flight data recorder. Well, of course he did: +2 Downgraded to the bloodstained, cockroach-infested accommodations. Short of an outbreak of the Norwalk virus, I’d say the H.M.S. Penny’s Father’s Boat is in the running for crappiest cruise line ever: -2 Resisted the urge to kill Michael on the spot. ‘Cause you know Sayid wanted to: +1   Net gain/loss: +5 Current score: 132
Frank:   Pointed out that Regina was reading her book upside down. This is one wacky boat: +1   Net gain/loss: +1 Current score: 116
Hurley:   The only member of the Oceanic Six to visit Sun. He looked pretty sharp in that suit, too: +2   Net gain/loss: +2 Current score: 115

 

After seven weeks of Lost-vivor 2, here are your updated standings:

1. Daniel (138)
2. Sayid (132) (+5)
3. Locke (123)
4. Ben (122)
5. Sawyer (118)
6. Desmond (116) (+3)
7. Frank (116) (+1)
8. Hurley (115) (+2)
9. Jack (109) (+1)
10. Juliet (109) (-5)
11. Sun (108) (+7)
12. Vincent (106)
13. Jin (104) (+5)
14. Kate (102) (+2)
15. Bernard (102) (+1)
16. Charlotte (100)
17. Michael (99) (-1)
18. Claire (98)
19. Rose (97)
20. Miles (93)

 
No major shakeups this week. Michael entered the rankings in seventeenth place (I’m really keeping track of twenty Lost-vivors?!), and Sayid closed in on Daniel’s lead. Sun posted the largest gains of the week, but she remains stuck near the middle of the pack for now.

So, that does it for this week’s installment of Lost-vivor. As always, I appreciate any feedback in the comments section. Thanks for reading, and I’ll see you next time.

« Hide it

Read more… or Read more right here… »

“The Other Woman” didn’t strike me as a spectacular episode, but it was certainly good enough in the sense that it kept the season’s momentum going strong. Juliet has never really grown on me as a character, and this episode didn’t do much to remedy the situation. I guess she’s always just felt a little nonessential int he grand scheme of things. There’s already a doctor and a tough chick with jungle survival skills on the island. Do we really need a tough chick doctor with jungle survival skills, too? Sure, it might be interesting if she was sharing all the cool secrets she knows thanks to her past with the Others, but of course, that never seems to come up.

Enough about Juliet, though. In other developments, Daniel continues to absolutely rock. Meanwhile, “The Other Woman” certainly gave Charlotte an edge the character was missing in previous appearances. On the other hand, it seems Locke is slowly reverting back into his indecisive, easily manipulated self, letting Ben play him like a fiddle. Oh, well…I guess it was inevitable. We can’t have Awesome Locke stick around too long, can we?

So, let’s take a look at this week’s scores. Oh, I almost forgot — by popular demand, I’ve added the Freighter Folk to the Lost-vivor rankings this week (with initial scores reflecting the points they “unofficially” earned in previous episodes).

Juliet:   Celebrity status on Island (and Ben’s secret crush) got her some pretty decent digs: +1 Apparently knows a chemical burn when she sees it: +1 Quip of the night: “It’s very stressful being an Other, Jack”: +1 Busted by Harper, the passive aggressive shrink, for her affair with Goodwin: -2 Enjoyed romantic beach getaway with Goodwin: +1 Got the drop on Daniel in the Tempest: +2 Whacked from behind by Charlotte. Ouch: -3 Eventually won the scuffle with Charlotte: +2 Kissed Jack. Anyone else think Kate should start dating Ben now, just to get back at Juliet? Or maybe Zombie Goodwin?: +3   Net gain/loss: +6 Current score: 114
Jin:   Silent Bob here didn’t bother mentioning that to anyone that he saw Charlotte and Daniel skulking off into the jungle. Just for that, Jin gets no points for busting out his increasingly mad English skillz: -2   Net gain/loss: -2 Current score: 99
Charlotte:   Bad liar (concerning the “out of juice” satellite phone): -2 Cold cocked Kate. Eh…she probably had it coming: +3 In what’s quickly becoming a signature move, whacked Juliet from behind. Ladies and gentlemen, Charlotte Lewis — snooty anthropologist by day, cheap-shot artist by night: +3   Net gain/loss: +4 Current score: 100
Claire:   Lobbied Locke to give her some face time with Miles. It didn’t work, but you have to give Claire credit for being proactive for a change: +2   Net gain/loss: +2 Current score: 98
Vincent:   Vincent cameo (getting his belly rubbed by Jin): +1   Net gain/loss: +1 Current score: 106
Locke:   Check out Daddy Warbucks, cooking up a fancy rabbit dinner and throwing around cash like it’s going out of style: +1 Let Ben out of the basement. Dude…he’s just going to Scooby Doo you (again): -2 Got some answers about who sent the freighter. So, I guess the H.M.S. Not Penny’s Boat is actually the H.M.S. Penny’s Father’s Boat. If Ben is to be trusted. Which, generally speaking, he isn’t: +3 Set Ben free. I guess Competent Locke has officially been replaced with our old friend Easily-Manipulated Locke: -5   Net gain/loss: -3 Current score: 123
Sawyer:   Defeated by Hurley at horseshoes: -1   Net gain/loss: -1 Current score: 118
Ben:   Still ordering around Juliet even while he’s a prisoner on the other side of the Island. Jack, Locke — pay attention. That’s what you call “leadership”: +2 Tried to get fresh with Juliet using the old “brush hands while looking through a stereoscope” trick. Shot down: -1 Reading Philip K. Dick’s VALIS. If you hold off a few years, I’m sure they’ll eventually adapt it into a shitty movie: +1 Totally getting inside Locke’s head. Yet again: +3 Juliet didn’t realize his dinner invitation was for two. Awkward: -1 Taped over the Red Sox: -1 Got all creepy with Juliet (”You’re mine”): -2 Locke was all like, “I’m setting you free!” and Hurley and Sawyer were all like, “WTF?!” and Ben was all like, “I have clean towels! See you at dinner!” and I was all like, “No way!”: +5   Net gain/loss: +6 Current score: 122
Daniel:   Has a map of the Island: +2 Stopped the deadly, deadly neurotoxin. Daniel is going to turn into a twitchy, nebbish, American version of Sayid if he keeps throwing around so much awesome: +9   Net gain/loss: +11 Current score: 138
Kate:   Tracked down Daniel and Charlotte: +3 Wait…was she even looking for them in the first place?: -2 Caught on to Charlotte and Daniel’s lies. Way to go, Encyclopedia Brown: +1 Clocked in the back of the head by Charlotte. That looked pretty brutal: -4 Used her super jungle tracking skills to find Charlotte, Daniel, and Juliet at the Tempest: +2   Net gain/loss: 0 Current score: 99
Jack:   Organized search party to find Charlotte and Daniel: +1 Didn’t bother to ask Juliet about the mysterious jungle whispers or the disappearing psychiatrist. ‘Cause, you know, it’s probably not an interesting story anyway: -4 Tended to Kate after stumbling across her in the jungle: +1 Kissed Juliet. All that was missing was a heartbroken reaction shot from Kate: +3   Net gain/loss: +1 Current score: 108
Hurley:   Defeated Sawyer at horseshoes: +1   Net gain/loss: +1 Current score: 113

 

Six week’s into the second season of Lost-vivor, here are your updated standings:

1. Daniel (138) (+11)
2. Sayid (127)
3. Locke (123) (-3)
4. Ben (122) (+6)
5. Sawyer (118) (-1)
6. Frank (115)
7. Desmond (113)
8. Hurley (113) (+1)
9. Juliet (114) (+6)
10. Jack (108) (+1)
11. Vincent (106) (+1)
12. Bernard (101)
13. Sun (101)
14. Charlotte (100) (+4)
15. Kate (99)
16. Jin (99) (-2)
17. Claire (98) (+2)
18. Rose (97)
19. Miles (93)

 
Oh, my! The addition of the Freighter Folk — specifically Daniel — certainly shook up the standings. With another strong showing this week, Daniel catapulted into first place. Meanwhile, Locke slipped a bit while Ben continues to steadily build up points. Even more so than last season, I think it’s anyone’s game at this point. Well, anyone’s but Claire’s. Thanks for reading Lost-vivor, and I’ll see you next time!

« Hide it

Read more… or Read more right here… »

Desmond has always been among my favorite Lost-vivors, so it’s no surprise that I really dug “The Constant.” The time travel element was unexpected (I’m striving to avoid reading spoilers this season), and I’m a total sucker for Penny and Desmond’s relationship. Yeah, yeah…I was getting all misty-eyed when they were declaring their love for each other. Go ahead, laugh it up. So what if I’m emotionally over-invested in Lost? That’s my job as the Keeper of Lost-vivor, right?

Right.

Aside from all the mushy romantic stuff, Daniel Faraday is quickly ascending the list of my favorite Lost characters. I’ve mentioned how much I enjoy Jeremy Davies’ performance before, but I also love that we finally have a character around who has some clue about what’s going on with the Mysterious Island (even if his memory is a little spotty). If next week’s promo is any indication, Daniel and company are going to continue to figure prominently in future episodes. So, what do you think, Lost-vivor Nation? Is it time to officially add the Freighter Folk to the rankings?

Oh, and did anyone else wonder if the “side effects” Desmond experienced in tonight’s episode might be the same “sickness” that Rousseau and others have associated with the Island? Hmm…

With five episodes down, I’m very pleased with Lost’s fourth season. As far as I’m concerned, the series has finally regained its momentum and sense of purpose. In fact, I don’t think I’ve looked forward to new episodes with such anticipation since the bygone days of the Hatch. Yes, I was one of those fans who totally adored the whole “push the button/don’t push the button” phase. Anyway, from what I’m reading on the Lost-osphere, this is how the rest of the season is shaping up:

• Episode 6: March 6 (”The Other Woman”)
• Episode 7: March 13 (”Ji Yeon”)
• Episode 8: March 20
• Episode 9: April 24
• Episode 10: May 1
• Episode 11: May 8
• Episode 12: May 15
• Episode 13: May 22 (season finale)

As I said last week, I’m glad that ABC extended Lost’s season by a few episodes now that the writers strike has ended. Where’s the fun in awarding the Lost-vivor championship after just eight episodes? Thirteen episodes, on the other hand — that’s a warrior’s number. Now, let’s start tallying up some points…

Desmond:   “Apparently, my consciousness is jumping through time again, brotha”: +4 “Only this time, it’s leaving me with swiss-cheesed memory, brotha — just like that show Quantum Leap: -1 Chewed out by his drill sergeant. They act like that in the Scottish military, too?: -1 Stuck doing push-ups and crunches in the rain. Reminded me of that movie Biloxi Blues where Ferris Bueller joins the army: -1 You know, as Desmond’s beard gets bushier, he’s starting to look a little like Barry Gibb of the Bee Gees: +1 Penny didn’t want to see him in the past. Poor Des: -2 Remembered the settings Future Daniel gave him, convinced Past Daniel that he really was from the future: +2 1996? That guess wasn’t even close: -1 Started blacking out randomly: -2 Suffered the Nosebleed of Certain Death (a time-honored television and film staple). You’re gonna die, brotha: -3 Found Penny’s father. I’m not entirely sure how, but he found him: +1 Tracked down Penny, convinced her to give him her phone number: +2 Remembered Penny’s phone number in the future: +2 Contacted Present Penny. Or, is she Future Penny? Either way, she still loves him: +5 And got his memory back: +3 And he’s Daniel’s constant. For whatever that’s worth: +1   Net gain/loss: +10 Current score: 113
Charlotte:   Called Jack “doctor.” It’s about time somebody started showing some respect around here: +1   Net gain/loss: +1 Current score: NA
Daniel:   Spilled the beans about the Island’s time discrepancy: +2 Arranged a rendezvous with Desmond in the past: +2 Thought ahead — or is it behind? — and provided Desmond with a code phrase for his time traveling adventures: +1 Demonstrated every “absent-minded professor” cliché imaginable. As a professor, I’m personally offended: -1 Holy frijoles! Daniel invented rodent-based time travel: +19 Uh…Des is right. You might want to get some protection for your head if you’re going to insist on playing with radiation. Might I suggest a tinfoil hat?: -6 Roughed up by Des in the past, got his chalkboard knocked over: -1   Net gain/loss: +16 Current score: NA
Eloise:   Consciousness traveled through time, successfully completed maze: +17 Brain short-circuited, died: -117   Net gain/loss: -100 Current score: NA
Sayid:   Quizzed Frank on the night/day time discrepancy: +2 Gave up his gun in exchange for the satellite phone. I dunno…it’s going to be harder to kill people with a phone: -3 Roughed up the ship’s doctor: +2 “Can you fix the comm system, brotha?” “I’ll need a minute.” How awesome is Sayid?: +2 Fixed it. Of course. Oh, and saved Desmond’s life in the process (without even knowing it): +3   Net gain/loss: +6 Current score: 127
Jack:   Knows how to put the satellite phone on speaker mode. Hey, that’s something, right?: +1   Net gain/loss: +1 Current score: 107
Frank:   Flew back to the freighter with only one casualty — Desmond’s sanity: +3 Talked Sayid into giving up his gun. That’s no easy feat: +2 Took Sayid to sickbay: +1   Net gain/loss: +6 Current score: NA

 

Not too many characters to score this week, but here are your updated standings:

1. Sayid (127) (+6)
2. Locke (126)
3. Sawyer (119)
4. Ben (116)
5. Desmond (113) (+10)
6. Hurley (112)
7. Juliet (108)
8. Jack (107) (+1)
9. Vincent (105)
10. Bernard (101)
11. Jin (101)
12. Sun (101)
13. Kate (99)
14. Claire (96)
15. Rose (97)

 
With episode five in the books, Sayid reclaims the lead from Locke. Meanwhile, Desmond — last season’s fan favorite — finally started racking up a few points. Tune in next week to see if he can continue to build on that momentum. As always, thanks for reading Lost-vivor, and I’ll see you next time!

« Hide it

Read more… or Read more right here… »

ADDITIONAL WARNING: Tonight’s installment of Lost-vivor was written under the influence of alcohol. Please excuse any grammatical, computational, and/or comedic errors.

“Eggtown” wasn’t the most riveting Lost episode in recent memory, but the show continues to boast a level of consistency that it lacked throughout much of Season 3. I’ve never been a fan of Kate-centric episodes, and courtroom dramas put me to sleep. That being said, the developments on the island were quite intriguing. I love that Locke is trying his damnedest to establish himself as the “new Ben” of Otherville. Of course, since he’s still easily-fooled, quick-to-anger John Locke, he’s not doing a terribly good job of it.

Meanwhile, anyone care to venture a guess about what was going on with Charlotte and Daniel’s card-guessing routine? Was it some kind of memory-loss thing or a psychic thing? Or was it incredibly obvious, and I just missed out on a piece of crucial dialogue?

I saw the “Aaron is Kate’s son” thing coming a mile away, and I suspect many other viewers did as well. It reminded me a bit of the “shocking” “revelations” that Claire was Jack’s half-sister and Locke’s dad was the original Sawyer. Does Aaron count as one of the Oceanic Six? Does Claire die, or does she stay on the island and let Aaron leave with Kate? I found Jack’s cover story for the crash quite interesting. Only eight people survived the crash, eh? Have I mentioned how much I love the whole flash forward concept overall? It really seems to have breathed new life into the show.

Speaking of new life, I was just reading earlier today that ABC has officially extended Lost’s season from eight episodes to thirteen. Not only am I thankful for the additional episodes, but I’m glad I won’t be crowning a Lost-vivor after a measly eight weeks. Sayid had to endure twenty-plus weeks of competition to win last season. This season’s winner (also likely to be Sayid) already has it way too easy.

Okay, I’m babbling. Let’s assign some points!

Kate:   Apparently, Kate is this week’s guest star on Law and Order: Mysterious Island Unit: -4 On the bright side, she has one of the most recognizable face in America: +2 Totally “Scooby Dooed” Hurley. Whatever the hell that means: +2 Kate has a son? Hmm…as a rule, I oppose the continued reproduction of the hew-mon species, but I’ll make an exception in this case: +2 Busted Miles out of the boathouse: +3 Banished from Lockeville: -4 Scored a little make-out time with Sawyer anyway: +3 Jack lied under oath to defend her. Aww…that’s sweet: +2 Interrupted Jack’s testimony. Gee, Kate, are you sure that you’re clear on how this whole “defendant” thing is supposed to work?: -1 Jumped on that deal for ten years probation when the prosecutor was willing to keep bargaining. Reminds me of that episode of Seinfeld where Kramer happily accepts the settlement for a lifetime supply of free coffee before Java World has a chance to mention the monetary component: -3 Turns out Jack was lying under oath when he said he didn’t love her. Nothing says “be mine” like perjury : +2 Kate named her baby after Claire’s baby? That’s unoriginal: -3 Oh, wait…she stole Claire’s baby! That’s a little more respectable: +4   Net gain/loss: +5 Current score: 99
Hurley:   Fell for the old “Locke told me to bring Miles his dinner” trick: -2 Wait a minute…wasn’t Hurley the mastermind who managed to con the near-omniscient Sayid last week? Now Kate is running circles around him? I’m deducting an extra point for good measure: -1   Net gain/loss: -3 Current score: 112
Daniel:   I’m not sure, but I think Charlotte just hustled him at three-card Monte: -1   Net gain/loss: -1 Current score: NA
Locke:   Woke up in a hospital bed. Thankfully, his remaining kidney still seems to be intact: +1 Prepared Ben a nutritious breakfast, including sliced DHARMA-lope, the official melon of Lost-vivor: +1 Threw a hissy fit, tossed Ben’s breakfast, stomped around Otherville, slammed doors, and generally made a scene: -2 “I just killed a chicken.” Ooo-kay, John. I think it’s time we talked about changing up your meds a little. Nevertheless, vaguely bad-ass: +1 It seems Locke is setting himself up as El Presidente of Otherville. Better him than Claire, I suppose. When Locke says “dinner at six,” you damn well better believe he means it: +2 Barged in on Kate and Claire without knocking. Manners, John. Manners: -1 Stuffed a live grenade in Miles’ mouth. Hardcore. Seriously, that’s like a 9.3 on the Jack Bauer Scale of Violent Awesomeness: +6   Net gain/loss: +8 Current score: 126
Miles:   Locked up in the boathouse: -2 Brokered deal with Kate to bust him out: +3 Yikes…$3.2 million. Dude drives a hard bargain: +2 Recaptured by Locke, downgraded to hanging from ceiling of boathouse by a chain: -3 Introduced to the unique flavor of live handgrenade: -8   Net gain/loss: -8 Current score: NA
Sawyer:   Found some clothes belonging to a deceased Other that just happen to be Kate’s size. I guess that almost counts as sweet. In a Sawyer kind of way: +1 Kate isn’t moving in with him. Are you kidding? Sawyer, Kate, and Hurley sharing a cabin is the best set-up for a sitcom since Hugo and the Ghost Hobbit: -2 Rocked the reading glasses. That’s old school Sawyer, yo: +1 Broke out the boxed DHARMA wine. That Sawyer is one smooth operator: +1 Saw through Kate’s attempts at manipulative island seduction: +3 But agreed to help her bust Miles out anyway: -1 Played on Locke’s love of backgammon. Remember when Sawyer — not Kate — was the island’s resident conman? I miss those days: +2 Bestowed nickname on Miles (”Bruce Lee from the Freighter”): +1 Bestowed nickname on Hurley (”Montezuma”): +1 Got hot and heavy with Kate. I hear the only thing better than make-up sex is pre-banishment sex: +4 Oh, wait…make that pre-banishment cuddling: -2 Called Kate on the “wait ’til you get pissed at Jack and bounce right back to me” thing: +2 Slapped by Kate for bringing up the aforementioned “bounce right back to me” thing: -1   Net gain/loss: +10 Current score: 119
Claire:   Apparently, Claire has been put in charge of making the coffee, doing the laundry, and taking care of the baby. I’m surprised Locke didn’t make her take off her shoes and cook everyone dinner while she was at it: -2 Hmm…Aaron is off with Kate in the future? Somehow, I can’t imagine that bodes well for Claire: -2   Net gain/loss: -4 Current score: 96
Ben:   Downgraded from rec room to basement: -1 But it seems the basement suite comes with a complimentary breakfast: +2 Mentioned Locke’s inability to find Jacob’s cabin, provoked John by saying he was “more lost than you ever were.” I see what you did there: +1 Complimentary breakfast offer rescinded: -2 May or may not be worth $3.2 million: +5   Net gain/loss: +5 Current score: 116
Juliet:   Convinced Charlotte to call the freighter’s emergency number. Is it just me, or has Juliet’s role been significantly downgraded this season?: +1   Net gain/loss: +1 Current score: 108
Sun:   Actually had dialogue this week. Congratulations! Welcome to Lost-vivor: +1   Net gain/loss: +1 Current score: 101
Jin:   Hey, look! That guy who barely speaks English and hangs out with Sun all the time is back, too: +1   Net gain/loss: +1 Current score: 101
Jack:   Surprise witness!: +2 Lied under oath to help Kate. Oh, Jack will gladly lie for Kate in court, but he wouldn’t even bend the truth for his own father in some silly malpractice suit a couple of seasons ago? For shame: -1 What does Jack have against Aaron? Isn’t he Jack’s half-nephew? Is there even such a thing as a half-nephew?: -1   Net gain/loss: 0 Current score: 106

 

With episode four in the books, here are the current Lost-vivor standings:

1. Locke (126) (+8)
2. Sayid (121)
3. Sawyer (119) (+10)
4. Ben (116) (+5)
5. Hurley (112) (-3)
6. Juliet (108) (+1)
7. Jack (106)
8. Vincent (105)
9. Desmond (103)
10. Bernard (101)
11. Jin (101) (+1)
12. Sun (101) (+1)
13. Kate (99) (+5)
14. Claire (96) (-4)
15. Rose (97)

 
It figures that they’d have to take Sayid off the show for a week for someone else — in this case, Locke — to seize the number one spot. That being said, there’s a tight race forming near the top between Sayid, Locke, Sawyer, and Ben. At this point, I think it’s anybody’s game. So, that’s it for this week’s Lost-vivor. Thanks for reading, and I’ll see you next time!

« Hide it

Read more… or Read more right here… »

After Lost kicked off the season with a couple of wild episodes, “The Economist” slowed down the storytelling pace a bit. That being said, the episode nevertheless offered some interesting revelations. Sayid as Ben’s post-rescue hired gun? I certainly didn’t see that coming. I bet Jin would be so proud to see Sayid following in his career footsteps. You remember Jin, right? He was that guy that used to occasionally appear on screen and deliver dialogue in earlier seasons of Lost. I think he had a girlfriend or sister or something on the island with him.

What really intrigues me, though, are the results of Daniel’s little experiment suggesting that the island exists thirty-one minutes behind the “real” world. I guess that explains why nobody can find the place; it’s like a tropical Brigadoon! I have no idea where they’re going with this, but my curiosity is piqued.

Aside from that, I don’t have much more to say about “The Economist.” Overall, I thought it was a solid episode — nothing earth-shattering, but we did get a few decent “WTF?!” moments. So, let’s take a look at the scores…

Sayid:   Sayid’s a golfer?: +1 And he’s one of the Oceanic Six! That’s surprising; I had always just assumed Sayid’s death was right around the corner dating back as far as the first season: +5 Murdered that dude on the golf course. That’ll teach him to stick his nose where it doesn’t belong. Specifically, in Sayid’s middle game: -3 Would it be awkward if I took this opportunity to point out what a handsome guy Sayid is? Yeah, I thought so: +1 Scored a date with Elsa: +1 How cool is Sayid? So cool that he throws away cell phones when he’s finished talking on them: +1 Basically told Jack to step aside and let him handle the “helicopter situation.” I guess Sayid looked at last season’s Lost-vivor scores and figured it was time for him to take charge: +4 Totally scored with