Posted on June 29, 2008
I’m sure I’m not the first to make this comparison, but if I had to describe Wanted using the familiar “X meets Y” formula, I’d go with The Matrix meets Fight Club. The Matrix elements — i.e. bullets that curve through the air, slow-mo shootouts, the whole “Chosen One” theme — definitely work in Wanted. On the other hand, the Fight Club elements — especially the attempts to replicate Edward Norton’s “I am Jack’s inner monologue” shtick — feel a bit forced. Wesley Gibson (played by James McAvoy) comes across in the film not so much existentially downtrodden as just plain whiny. At several points in the film, I found myself wishing the character would just shut up and start shooting stuff already.
Don’t get me wrong; Wanted isn’t necessarily a bad movie. The action sequences are truly out of this world, and Angelina Jolie turns in a compelling performance as a glowering assassin who inducts Wesley into the secretive Fraternity. If only McAvoy’s protagonist were more relatable — or even remotely likable — Wanted could have transcended to that Zen-like cinematic state of Big, Dumb Summer Fun. Unfortunately, it remains one magic bullet short of a full clip.
The verdict: B-
Posted on June 27, 2008
Yikes! According to this New York Post article, the upcoming seventh season of Fox’s 24 will jump ahead four years from the events depicted in Season 6 (signified in the new season by the presence of Chloe O’Brian’s four-year-old son). The article goes on to suggest that this now places the new season of 24 in the far-flung future of 2017. That can’t be right, can it?
Let’s see here…Season 1 debuted in November 2001 and featured Senator David Palmer’s run for the presidency as a central plot point. If we assume that presidential elections in the “24 universe” take place during the same years as they do in the “real world,” that means that 24’s first season is most likely set in either 2000 or 2004. So, if we go with the later start date and take into account that Palmer is in the midst of a presidential primary, we can pinpoint Season 1 as taking place during Spring 2004.
We’re then told that Season 2 — wherein Jack Bauer tried to prevent a nuke from detonating in Los Angeles (and Kim Bauer battles a cougar) — picks up 18 months after the events of Season 1. If we go with the Spring 2004 start date for Season 1, that advances the timeline to Fall 2005 for Season 2.
When we join recovering heroin addict Jack Bauer in Season 3, we’re told it’s three years after the events of Season 2. That places Season 3 in Fall 2008 (i.e. the future).
Season 4, which finds Jack Bauer working for Secretary of Defense James Heller, jumps ahead another 18 months. That means we’re looking at Spring 2010 for the fourth season. When Bauer emerges from hiding at the beginning Season 5, it’s 18 months later, thus advancing the 24 timeline to Fall 2011.
Finally, Jack Bauer is released from a Chinese prison in Season 6 after serving a 20-month sentence. By my estimate, that means Season 6 was set sometime during the summer of 2013. The season ends with Chloe O’Brian revealing that she’s pregnant. If her son is four years old when Season 7 begins, that means…holy crap, Season 7 of 24 really is set in 2017! Just by way of comparison, Ridley Scott’s sci-fi classic Blade Runner is set in Los Angeles during November 2019.
If that’s the case, and the new season of 24 really is set in the year 2017, is it too much to ask that they have Jack Bauer use a laser pistol and flying car to fight terrorists? I mean, hello — it’s the future!
Posted on June 26, 2008
8 Rules for Surviving the Apocalypse, including my personal favorite: “Do not join a theme gang.”
Posted on June 25, 2008
Hold on a second…did I just watch a 90-minute cartoon about tentacle rape?
Without treading too far into spoiler territory, that’s the central plot of Futurama’s latest straight-to-DVD feature, The Beast with a Billion Backs. An anomaly opens up in space, allowing a giant tentacle monster from another universe (voiced by David Cross) to get freaky with everyone in our universe.
As you might imagine, the humor is slightly raunchier than the average Futurama outing — which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Unfortunately, The Beast with a Billion Backs gets off to a rather slow start, while Bender is stuck in a B-story about a shadowy League of Robots that doesn’t really go anywhere for most of the film. Overall, the movie felt like a slight step down from Bender’s Big Score in terms of quality. Nevertheless, The Beast with a Billion Backs certainly offers its share of laughs. I was particularly delighted to see newly-promoted Rear Brigadier Zapp Brannigan in a supporting role, bravely defending our universe from the encroaching tentacle threat. As for the animation and voice acting, they’re as good as ever .
The DVD release — awesomely packaged with kitschy retro sci-fi art and blurbs inviting the viewer to “See! A monster of questionable morality!” — also includes what’s being billed as Futurama: The Lost Adventure. Basically, the “lost” episode consists of the 3D-animated cutscenes from 2003’s Futurama video game, strung together into a surprisingly cohesive story about an attempt by Mom (evil CEO of Mom’s Friendly Robot Company) to take over the universe. All the familiar voice actors are on board, and it makes for a fun new addition to the Futurama universe –at least for those of us who don’t own an Xbox.
To sum up, I wanted more from The Beast with a Billion Backs, but slightly disappointing Futurama is better than no Futurama at all. I’d certainly recommend the DVD to any Futurama fans out there, but I suspect most either already own it or are in the process of securing a copy.
The verdict: B-
Posted on June 23, 2008
Slightly sillier than the average episode of Alias, slightly less silly than the average Austin Powers flick.
As a loyal fan of the Don Adams/Barbara Feldon series from the ’60s, I went into Get Smart with a degree of trepidation, expecting relatively little from the spy spoof. Much to my surprise, I ended up really getting a kick out of the film adaptation. Steve Carell and Anne Hathaway are marvelous as Agents 86 and 99, while Alan Arkin’s nearly steals the show with his energetic performance as the Chief.
And, hey — at least it’s not The Love Guru.
The verdict: B+
Posted on June 19, 2008
Lost is a television show known for its convoluted plot twists, enduring mysteries, shifting alliances, bizarre coincidences, shocking reveals, and its ability to make viewers take a step back every few episodes and ask a simple question: “WTF?!” Below, you’ll find my picks for the top 30 “WTF?!” moments in Lost history. Enjoy!
WARNING: The following post contains spoilers for all four seasons of Lost. Proceed at your own risk.
#30: International jewel thieves Nikki and Paulo are buried alive
Episode: “Exposé” (Season 3)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Let me get this straight. Lost introduced a couple of new cast members at the beginning of Season 3, quickly turned them into the most annoying characters ever, and then went into Twilight Zone territory and buried them alive? That’s hardcore, man. Oh, and for a bonus “WTF?!” moment, what was Sawyer thinking when he threw those perfectly good diamonds into “Nina and Pablo’s” grave?
#29: Jack plays football with the Others
Episode: “Par Avion” (Season 3)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Typically, when you set out on a rescue mission, you don’t expect to find the captive playing two-hand touch with his captors. Yet, that’s exactly what Sayid, Locke, Kate, and Rousseau witnessed they hiked to the barracks to retrieve Jack from the “clutches” of the Others. Had Jack sided with the Others? Had he been brainwashed? Was he suffering from a case of Stockholm Syndrome? Perhaps most importantly, was it a DHARMA-issued football?
#28: Sayid is revealed as Ben’s hitman in the future
Episode: “The Economist” (Season 4)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Sayid becoming an assassin after leaving the Island didn’t seem so far-fetched, but Sayid working for Ben of all people? That definitely qualifies as a “WTF?!” moment in my book.
#27: Sun gives birth in the future, Jin rushes to the hospital in the past
Episodes: “Ji Yeon” (Season 4)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Very tricky, Lost writers! Considering Sun was busy delivering her baby girl, it only made sense that Jin was rushing to the hospital to be with her. It wasn’t until the end of the episode that we realized Sun’s delivery-room scenes were flashforwards, whereas Jin’s scenes were actually flashbacks. Why wasn’t Jin at the hospital when Sun gave birth to Ji Yeon? Well, for an added “WTF?!” bonus, Sun visits Jin’s grave in the episode’s closing scene.
#26: The drug smugglers’ plane falls, killing Boone
Episodes: “Deus Ex Machina”/”Do No Harm” (Season 1)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Unless you count the pilot or the federal marshal, Boone was the first main character to perish on Lost. Even if Locke maintained that Boone was “a sacrifice that the Island demanded,” his shocking death drove home the message that nobody was safe on this show.
#25: Christian Shephard appears on the Island
Episode: “White Rabbit” (Season 1)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Jack was in Australia to retrieve his father’s remains, so what is Christian Shephard doing strolling around the Island, seemingly alive and well? Jack would eventually find Christian’s coffin intact, yet with no body inside. Christian’s apparition/zombie went on to lead Jack to a source of fresh water at the caves, before reappearing just as mysteriously in Jacob’s cabin a few seasons later.
#24: Daniel confirms that time doesn’t work quite right on the Island
Episode: “The Economist” (Season 4)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: We all had our suspicions that time was a little out of whack on the Island, but it wasn’t until physicist Daniel Faraday arrived that we received confirmation. After conducting his rocket experiment, Daniel discovered a 31-minute time differential between the Island and the rest of the world. A few episodes later, we would see this differential in action…when the corpse of the freighter’s doctor washed ashore on the Island before he was killed and thrown overboard back on the freighter.
#23: Richard Alpert doesn’t age
Episodes: “Not in Portland,” “The Man Behind the Curtain,” and “Cabin Fever” (Seasons 3/4)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: When Richard Alpert first showed up in the episode “Not in Portland,” he appeared to be nothing more than DHARMA’s smooth-talking recruiter. Of course, that’s before he appeared a few episodes later in Ben’s flashback — looking like he hadn’t aged a day from the early ’70s to the present day. Oh, and by Season 4, we spotted the seemingly ageless Alpert back in the 1950s, visiting John Locke as a child. Does Alpert really not age, or is he traveling through time somehow? It’s a mystery yet to be revealed.
#22: Sayid, Sun, and Jin discover the four-toed statue
Episode: “Live Together, Die Alone” (Season 2)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: I think Sayid put it best when he said, “I don’t know what I find more disquieting: the fact that the rest of the statue is missing, or that it has four toes.” If nothing else, what’s left of the statue seems to suggest that the Island has been inhabited long before the DHARMA Initiative — much less the survivors of Oceanic 815 — got there.
#21: The Losties open the Hatch…and find a Scottish guy living inside
Episodes: “Exodus, Part 2″/”Man of Science, Man of Faith” (Seasons 1/2)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: The second season opened with an average guy having what appeared to be a typical morning — rolling out of bed, putting on some music, working out, and eating breakfast. Suddenly, an explosion rocks his apartment. It’s then that the viewer realizes he’s not in an apartment at all; he’s inside the Hatch. After Locke spent half the first season trying to gain access to the Hatch (the man built a trebuchet, for Christ’s sake), what does he find inside? A guy named Desmond, charged with pushing a button every 108 minutes in order to “save the world.”
#20: Ana Lucia shoots and kills Shannon
Episode: “Abandoned” (Season 2)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Shannon’s death came out of nowhere — even more so than her stepbrother’s. After seeing visions of the missing Walt, Shannon ran into the jungle in search of him. Unfortunately, she stumbles across Ana Lucia, who mistakes Shannon for an Other and shoots her. She dies in Sayid’s arms as the Tailies stand nearby, shocked. Frankly, I’m shocked Sayid didn’t lay a serious beat down on Ana Lucia.
#19: Dr. Arzt blows himself up
Episode: “Exodus, Part 2″ (Season 1)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Poor Dr. Arzt — shockingly blown up while lecturing the “A-Team” on the dangers of handling dynamite. Even more shocking? The Losties’ indifference to his death. “Dude…you’ve got some Arzt on you.” Poor Dr. Arzt.
#18: The Losties encounter a polar bear in the jungle
Episode: “Pilot, Part 2″ (Season 1)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: The unexplained appearance of a polar bear in the middle of a jungle was one of the first clues that something wasn’t quite right about the Island. Good thing Sawyer was around to shoot it. Interestingly, we saw a polar bear skeleton pop up in the Tunisian desert in Season 4 — the same place Ben apparently teleported when he moved the Island in the Season 4 finale.
#17: Ethan’s name doesn’t appear on the flight manifest
Episode: “Raised By Another” (Season 1)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: By this point in Season 1, Rousseau had already made mention of the mysterious Others, but it’s Hurley’s impromptu census that reveals an outsider — Ethan Rom — has infiltrated the Losties’ camp. Ethan would go on to kidnap Claire before being shot and killed by Charlie a few days later.
#16: The Others live in a idyllic little town on the other side of the Island
Episode: “A Tale of Two Cities” (Season 3)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: We already had reason to believe that the Others’ primitive appearance was all an act, but it wasn’t until the Season 3 premiere that we realized just how much of an act. Not only were the Others not “hillbillies” (as Michael once described them), but they seemed to be living a fairly mundane suburban existence — complete with weekly book club meetings — before the crash of Flight 815. Clearly, there was more to the Others than we had been led to believe in the previous two seasons.
#15: Locke’s dad shows up on the Island
Episode: “The Man from Tallahassee” (Season 3)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: When Ben told Locke to imagine a “magic box” on the Island that could produce whatever someone wanted, seemingly out of thin air, he probably meant it as a metaphor. That still doesn’t explain how Ben was able to produce a gagged and bound Anthony Cooper — a.k.a. Locke’s father — in “The Man from Tallahassee.”
#14: Oceanic Flight 815 crashes
Episode: “Pilot, Part 1″ (Season 1)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Sure, the opening minutes of Lost’s pilot don’t seem quite so shocking four seasons later, but just think back to the first time you saw the episode. A man in a suit — looking curiously like Charlie from Party of Five — wakes up in the middle of a jungle. After seeing a Labrador trot by, the man stands up and rushes through the jungle, eventually arriving at a beach…where he discovers the wreckage of an airliner and a few dozen panicked survivors. Not only did these opening scenes give us our first glimpse of characters who would go on to become some of our favorite Losties, but seeing that guy sucked into the plane’s still-running engine still packs a wallop four years later. Why did the plane crash? How did these people survive? Where are they? These opening scenes did a spectacular job of setting up the meta-”WTF?!” that has driven the entire series ever since.
#13: Locke meets Jacob
Episode: “The Man Behind the Curtain” (Season 3)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Ben gets his orders from a mysterious higher authority only that only he can see or talk to? I don’t know about you, but to me that suggests that either: 1) Ben is crazy, or 2) Jacob doesn’t exist. Ben simply made him up to legitimize his leadership over the Others. Locke seemed to reach the same conclusions when Ben took him to visit Jacob’s cabin…until the whole place started shaking and a mysterious figure appeared appeared sitting in a nearby chair, imploring Locke to “help” him. Either Jacob exists, or that’s one heck of an imaginary friend.
#12: The Orientation Film
Episode: “Orientation” (Season 2)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: After finally gaining access to the Hatch, Desmond sits Jack and Locke down to watch an orientation film that spells out the purpose of the Swan station. The film — produced by a mysterious group called the DHARMA Initiative — explains that due to an unspecified “incident” in the past, it is of utmost importance that a code (4-8-15-16-23-42, naturally) be entered into the Swan’s computer every 108 minutes. Of course, “man of science” Jack assumes the Swan is little more than a psychological experiment, whereas “man of faith” Locke dedicates himself to pushing the button. Of course, we wouldn’t find out who was right until the end of the season.
#11: Oceanic 815 is found at the bottom of the ocean…with no survivors
Episodes: “D.O.C.”, “The Brig,” and “Confirmed Dead” (Seasons 3/4)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Not long after parachuting down to the Island in Season 3, Naomi dropped the bombshell that Oceanic Flight 815 had been found with no survivors. By Season 4, we had seen news coverage of the plane’s recovery, as well as footage of the wreckage lying on the ocean floor. Who was responsible for staging the crash site? Perhaps even more disconcerting, where did the bodies come from? Fingers have been pointed at both Ben Linus and Charles Widmore as the perpetrators of the ruse, but we still don’t know for sure.
#10: Michael shoots Ana Lucia and Libby
Episode: “Live Together, Die Alone” (Season 2)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Michael is supposed to be one of the good guys, right? Sure, the Others had struck a deal with Michael — free Ben, and we’ll return Walt — but nobody said anything about murdering Ana Lucia. And poor Libby? She was simply unfortunate enough to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. The shootings seemed to come out of nowhere, further cementing Lost’s reputation as a show where anything could happen.
#9: Locke was in a wheelchair before he came to the Island
Episode: “Walkabout” (Season 1)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: On the Island, John Locke was a quasi-mystical knife-throwing badass. One could only assume that prior to the crash, he had a military background or special forces training or something that would explain his survival skills. As we discovered in Lost’s fourth episode, before coming to the Island, Locke worked…at a box factory? Of course, that wasn’t the half of it. It wasn’t until the end of the episode that we reached the big reveal: before the crash, Locke was confined to a wheelchair. What forces allowed him to be running around, hunting boars on the Island remains a mystery four seasons later.
#8: Ms. Hawking knows all about Desmond’s future
Episode: “Flashes Before Your Eyes” (Season 3)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Desmond’s consciousness hopping around through time in “Flashes Before Your Eyes” was a “WTF?!” moment in and of itself, but even more bizarre was his encounter with jewelry store clerk Ms. Hawking. When Desmond tries to change his past and buy an engagement ring for Penny, Ms. Hawking informs him that he will do nothing of the sort. Instead, he will break Penny’s heart, enter the boat race to prove her father wrong, and end up stranded on the Island where he will push the button for the next three years. History, it seems, has a way of “course correcting.” How Ms. Hawking knew about Desmond’s future — or even that Desmond’s consciousness was traveling through time — remains a mystery.
#7: Anthony Cooper shoves Locke out of an eighth-story window
Episode: “The Man from Tallahassee” (Season 3)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: How Locke lost the use of his legs was one of the show’s longest-enduring mysteries — that is, until we found out the rather tragic answer in Season 3. While Locke was confronting his father, Anthony Cooper, about a con job he was running, viewers were surprised by Cooper’s sudden — and brutal — response. Seemingly out of nowhere, Cooper lunged at Locke and pushed him out an eighth story window, paralyzing Locke from the waist down and leaving him confined to a wheelchair.
#6: The Smoke Monster kills Flight 815’s pilot
Episode: “Pilot, Part 2″ (Season 1)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: The Monster wouldn’t appear on screen until the Season 1 finale, but it made its presence felt early on in the pilot episode, knocking over trees and making its now-familiar mechanical noises. And it wouldn’t be long before the Monster claimed its first victim. When Jack, Kate, and Charlie set out in search of the cockpit, they found the pilot alive, but badly injured. After informing the Losties that the plane had flown hundreds of miles off-course, the pilot was abruptly pulled out of the cockpit by an unseen force. His bloodied corpse was found high in a tree a few moments later, leaving the Losties — and the viewers at home — wondering what could have caused his gruesome death.
#5: Locke is in the coffin
Episode: “There’s No Place Like Home, Parts 2 & 3″ (Season 4)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Well, for starters, it’s a “WTF?!” moment because Locke (a.k.a Jeremy Bentham) is dead. Since he wasn’t a member of the Oceanic Six, it only stood to reason that Locke had remained behind on the Island. When did he leave? Why did he leave? How did he die? Hopefully, we’ll begin to unravel this mystery in Season 5.
#4: Locke decides not to press the button
Episode: “Live Together, Die Alone” (Season 2)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Following the discovery of the Pearl and its surveillance screens, John Locke lost faith in the button and decided it was nothing more than a psychological experiment. So, in the Season 2 finale, he resolved to stop pressing the button and went so far as to destroy the Swan’s computer monitor. Bad idea. The 108-minute timer counted down to zero, some creepy hieroglyphics appeared on the clock, and the system began to fail. While Desmond was ultimately able to avert disaster by using the failsafe key, the resulting electromagnetic pulse turned the sky purple, imploded the Swan, nearly killed Eko, left Desmond with precognitive abilities, and briefly made the Island visible to a listening station in the Antarctic. I guess the Swan wasn’t a psychological experiment after all.
#3: Ben moves the Island
Episode: “There’s No Place Like Home, Parts 2 & 3″ (Season 4)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Behind the scenes, Lost’s producers referred to the “big twist” of Season 4’s finale as the “frozen donkey wheel.” How were we supposed to know they were being so literal. As Season 4 drew to a close, Ben descended into an icy cavern below the Orchid station, turned a giant wheel, and moved the freakin’ Island. It was there one minute, and the next…gone. In my experience, islands don’t usually do that. Given the unique nature of the experiments conducted at the Orchid station, can we assume that the Island has moved not only in space, but in time as well?
#2: The Others kidnap Walt
Episode: “Exodus, Part 2″ (Season 1)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: As Season 1 drew to a close, Michael and Jin had finished construction of their raft and set sail in search of rescue. Instead, they found the Others, who demanded that they turn over “the boy.” Then, just for good measure, they blew up the raft. Three seasons later, we’re still not entirely sure why the Others wanted Walt, but getting him back would become one of the pivotal plot points of Season 2.
#1: Jack and Kate are off the Island…and in the future?!
Episode: “Through the Looking Glass” (Season 3)
Why it’s a “WTF?!” moment: Talk about a game-changing moment! After three seasons of the familiar flashback format, the Lost writers threw us a curveball and flashed forward to the future — where a bearded, self-destructive Jack is intent on returning to the Island. “Through the Looking Glass” not only offered a spectacular twist ending (dubbed the “snake in the mailbox” by Lost’s producers), but the episode also introduced a new narrative structure that opened up a whole new world of storytelling possibilities for Season 4.
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Posted on June 16, 2008
A handy list of spoilers for M. Night Shyamalan’s The Happening…so you can make fun of the film without actually having to watch it.
Posted on June 12, 2008
Yay! Stephanie wins! I’m kinda obsessed with Top Chef (and, for that matter, most of Bravo’s reality programming), and I was thrilled to see Stephanie come out on top in the finale. I picked Steph and Richard as my favorites at the beginning of the season, and it was delightful to finally see a woman named Top Chef. Was it just me, though, or did the discussion at Judges’ Table suggest to anyone else that Collichio et al. actually preferred cross-armed Lisa’s meal over Stephanie’s? Either there was some misleading editing going on, or that was one hell of a lamb shank.
Now, let’s see here…we have Shear Genius, Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D-List, Flipping Out, and Bravo’s final season of Project Runway to keep me busy the rest of the summer. Thanks for tiding me — and my voracious DVR — over until the Fall television season starts, Bravo!
Posted on June 10, 2008
My mother-in-law has a rather unique notion of what constitutes casual dinner conversation.
“So, what’s the dumbest thing you’ve done this year?” she asks, as if we’re suddenly playing a familiar party game.
It doesn’t take me long to come up with an answer. A few weeks ago, I was strolling across campus, happily listening to my iPod. Happily, that is, until I noticed an odd crackly distortion in my earbuds. Then, the sound briefly dropped from the right audio channel. A few seconds later, the right audio channel had returned, but the left was gone. My assumption? The earbuds are dying. Seems reasonable, right?
A few hours later, I was back home. I swapped out the presumably dying earbuds for a backup set. Much to my dismay, the distortion and dropouts were still there. My new hypothesis: the headphone jack is loose/corroded/busted/generally jacked up. In other words, it’s the iPod — not the earbuds. Of course, my iPod warranty had expired a few weeks earlier, and I’d need a plane ticket to get to the nearest Apple Store.
Knowing that I couldn’t live a day without my precious music-giving device, I bit the bullet, rushed out to Best Buy, and purchased a new iPod nano. I then returned home, charged it up, popped in my favorite earbuds, and heard…the same crackly distortion and stereo dropouts.
This couldn’t be right, could it? I tried the earbuds that were packaged with the new iPod and, lo and behold, the distortion was gone. Then, out of morbid curiosity, I tested out the new earbuds with the old, supposedly busted iPod. No distortion. Everything was crystal clear.
So, to recap, two sets of earbuds inexplicably failed on the same day, leading me to assume that it was my iPod — not the earbuds — that had a problem. So, I immediately ran out and dropped some cash on a new iPod, only to discover that there was nothing wrong with the old one in the first place. Of course, Best Buy wouldn’t accept a return on the new iPod since it had been opened.
Oh, well…I guess I have a backup iPod now for the next time mine dies. Or appears to have died.
Posted on June 9, 2008
1. It’s Indiana Jones.
2. It’s LEGO.
3. Any video game where Temple of Doom’s Willie has the “special ability” to scream so shrilly that she literally shatters glass (making otherwise inaccessible items and areas available to the player) is tops in my book.
Posted on June 6, 2008
A couple of summers ago, I marveled at the fact that I had enjoyed The Devil Wears Prada more than Superman Returns. In fact, I went on to dub it “Bizarro Summer” as a result of this apparent rip in the space/time/moviegoing continuum.
Well, now it’s 2008, and I thought the Sex and the City movie was vastly superior to the lackluster Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Welcome to Bizarro Summer II. I expect to have my Geek License revoked any day now.
Posted on June 5, 2008
Good lord, what happened?
Yes, I’ve officially become one of those annoying fans who insists that a favorite band’s “old stuff” is infinitely superior to whatever they’re doing now. In the case of Weezer, I worshiped at the altars of the Blue Album and Pinkerton back in the 1990s, but I have no idea what’s going on with the Red Album.
Whether it’s self-indulgent reflections on celebrity (”Pork and Beans,” “The Greatest Man That Ever Lived”), a paean to Eddie Rabbitt, Nirvana, and frontman Rivers Cuomo’s other favorite musical acts (”Heart Songs”), singsongy melodies (”Troublemaker”), ill-advised tracks written and/or sung by Cuomo’s bandmates (”Thought I Knew,” “Cold Dark World,” “Automatic”), or just an endless series of “sad/bad” Mother Goose rhymes (pretty much every song), this album is a complete mess.
Is the Red Album supposed to be bad in an ironic, tongue-in-cheek kind of way, or is it just plain bad? Don’t ask me. From the listener’s standpoint, though, is “ironically bad” really much of an improvement over an album that turned out awful by accident?
Posted on June 2, 2008
Okay, I didn’t hate the new Indiana Jones flick, but I was certainly underwhelmed. How sad is it that I have plans to go see Sex and the City later this week and fully expect to enjoy it more than Kingdom of the Crystal Skull? Very sad.
A lot of kids watched Raiders of the Lost Ark and decided they wanted to be whip-cracking adventurers when they grew up. I watched Raiders and decided I wanted to be a college professor. Don’t worry, Indy — Sex and the City would have to be really, really good before I’d consider a career change to sex columnist/fashionista.
