Review: “Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End”
Posted on May 27, 2007 @ 10:35 am
Let’s see if I can briefly sum up Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End. Blah, blah, swordfight. Blah, blah, Davy Jones’ Locker. Blah, blah, Cap’n Jack. Blah, blah, pirate lords. Blah, blah, double-cross. Blah, blah, swordfight. Blah, blah, goddess bound in human form. Blah, blah, Mexican standoff. Blah, blah, Keira and Orlando. Blah, blah, sea battle. Blah, blah, swordfight. Blah, blah, credits.
Seriously, I haven’t seen a movie franchise go this far downhill this fast since Reloaded and Revolutions took a bullet-time crap on The Matrix.
At World’s End isn’t confusing, per se, but the storyline is far more convoluted than seems necessary for a simple pirate movie. Subplots go nowhere, and the story falls a few pieces of eight short of making sense at times. Moreover, the characters’ motivations are often unclear — particularly in the case of Will Turner. Oh, and if you haven’t seen Pirates 2 in the past few days, you might want to bone up on the previous installment before you head out to the theater. There’s very little in the way of recap in At World’s End, and you’ll likely find yourself saying, “Hey, it’s that guy! I forgot about that guy!” several times as characters from the previous films are reintroduced.
Johnny Depp rolls out his Captain Jack Sparrow shtick once again in At World’s End, and it’s as bizarrely entertaining as ever. Surprisingly, however, the film belongs to Geoffrey Rush as Captain Barbossa. Naturally, the film doesn’t bother to explain why the villain of the first Pirates film is suddenly the most trustworthy man on the Spanish Main, but his rollicking, over-the-top performance is just golden. Meanwhile, the characters of Will Turner (Orlando Bloom) and Elizabeth Swann (Keira Knightley) feel as tacked-on as ever. “This pirate movie simply must have a love story! Must!” Speaking of Elizabeth, is it just me, or is the whole “fiercely-independent firebrand that can intimidate an entire boatload of bloodthirsty pirates” act starting to seem just as clichéd as the standard “damsel in distress” archetype?
All told, Pirates of the Caribbean is a rather difficult movie to sit through. It’s not particularly funny, the action scenes fall flat, it runs nearly an hour too long, and it simply feels like we’ve seen it all before. Bright spots like the dueling captains, Jack and Barbossa, or the top-notch CGI work on Davy Jones just aren’t enough to save the film from a half-baked plot and overwrought script. I guess that’s what happens when you try to adapt a 14-minutes theme park ride into a trilogy of major motion pictures. Disney should have stopped after it made the perfect pirate movie the first time around.
The verdict: D+
Posted by Jess | Filed Under Pop Culture |
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I was so glad to see Barbosa return at the end of the 2nd movie.
I haven’t seen the third movie yet, but even in the first movie, Barbosa rulez. Probably the best over the top pirate I’ve every been witness to. I realize I stand in the minority on this, but if it hadn’t been for him, the first movie would have been unwatchable.
Captain Jack is comic relief as leading man. Barbosa is a PIRATE. “Why’s the rum gone?” versus “Yer off the edge of the map, matey - HERE there be monsters!” Makes me wanna go ARRRRRRRRR!
I agree with you that Disney should have left well enough alone. I didn’t expect to like the first movie at all, honestly. It was a pleasant suprise. But the 2nd was a vast disappointment, and it doesn’t look like they had a plan to rescue it.
Alas.
I jus’ saw it meself and I agree completely. I am an outspoken opponent of movie sequels.
But there will be more, because this one will rake in the doubloons.
Haven’t seen the third one yet, but I find my opinions on movies differs vastly on whatever the movie’s relying on. In the first pirate movie, everything seemed to be depending on the plot, thus I became bogged down with all the annoying plotholes that I still can’t figure out after several viewings. The second pirate movie relied more on special effects, and since I didn’t see anything wrong with the special effects, I therefore ignored the plot and liked that one better.
It must be just me. I always like the underdogs of movie trilogies for some reason.
I read that they built in options at the end of this movie for more Jack Sparrow hijinks and that Depp is open to it. Just that alone makes me think I should say goodbye to this now. Still, I’m probably going to see it. Because, hey, otherwise I can’t say jack about it and I don’t want to be left out. Plus, there’s nothing else out there to see! I still have free movie coupons though — that makes me feel slightly less dirty about the whole thing.
I liked it well enough. It was certainly an improvement from Dead Man’s Chest. Elizabeth wasn’t even as annoying as she normally is. However, the ending just pissed me off. I mean, it’s DISNEY. Come ON. A happier ending wouldn’t kill anyone.
Warning: comment contains one teeny tiny spoiler.
Excellent review, I couldn’t agree more. It was the watch checkiest movie I’ve ever seen. Also, Will Turner’s and Elizabeth’s teeth are far to distracting in contrast to the Pirates’ grungecisors. I get that the marketeers want them to appear sexy, but if that’s the case then give me a better story line so I won’t be distracted by the shiny white Ross Gellar teeth. Also, that whole Gulliver’s Travels scene didn’t live up to the big “release the goddess” build up. Release the goddess and she’ll give you crabs? Ew.
This will be the only Disney movie in which you will hear the term “yeasty codpiece”, so it comes highly recommended by me.
I would like to do awful things to Gore Verbinski just for making me watch that icky implied sex scene between Orlando and Kierra. God Orlando is more womanly than Kierra! I hade to hide my eyes it was all too creepy!
yeah well, you also didn’t like the second one. weirdo.
You know, I loved the first one, but all of the mixed reviews have made me steer clear of the sequels so far. I’ll rent them both someday.
But I did want to comment on your line about the “fiercely-independent firebrand” becoming so cliche. Personally I think it’s almost worse than the “damsel in distress” because we’ve gotten to the point that the woman must be overly strong or else everybody thinks they’re sending a bad message. They seemed to do a good job with Keira in the first movie, but I’m sure they botched it up later.
[...] of the Caribbean movie today. I had read several underwhelming reviews for the movies, including this one from Jess, who I always agree with. To steal an excellent quote from his review: “Let’s see [...]
Am I the only one who missed the fact that Johnny Depp had his shirt off? Um, there were multiple Jack Sparrows=multiple hotness? And, Will turned bad-ass at the end, and looked even hotter than usual? C’mon if nothing else, see the movie for the eye candy. But I understand not everyone can appreciate this fact.
And…I’m guessing everyone didn’t stay until the credits were over? There is a little tidbit that might make you a somewhat happy.
I’d have to agree to amount of eye candy in this one… Esp the end where Orlando Bloom takes over the ship. Nothin says hot like a good lookin’ pirate in black.
Hey! Yea, how did ya’ll find out about the stuff after the credits? I had no idea until someone asked if I stayed passed the credits… what did I miss? I’m not so sure I want to sit another 3 hrs just to see the end..
I personally do not like the “Pirates” movies. I did enjoy this one the best. The worst thing about these movies, besides being too long, is that subtitles are needed to understand the plot of the films.
yeah, at the end of the credits it shows will coming back, and will/lizzie have a ten year old son. i personally liked this movie the best(eyecandy, hehe) because:
1:will and jack looked really hawt!
2:i thot it was funny
3:me and my friend (we watched it on premier nite) were shaking the whole time,even tho i dont no why.
i have to agree with jess about elizabeth, tho. the whole super-awesome-fighter-who-can-intimidate-a-boatload-of-fullygrown-pirates thing was really stupid. and they made her too perfect, too:
1:gorgeous
2:every guy in the movie loves/kisses her
3:she does that cheesy hoist-the-colors speech
4:she becomes pirate queen
5:she is a gr8 swordfighter
6:she even knows how to swim!(usually ppl in those days couldnt swim)
and yes, that whole sort-of sex scene @ the end was really unneeded.
other than that, i really liked the movie. jack is sooo hot!! (will is cute too)