Flummoxing the flimflam man
Posted on May 23, 2007 @ 9:49 am
So, I was shopping for groceries earlier when a guy — maybe 25 years old, dressed like a frat kid — approached me in the pet supplies aisle. “Dude,” he implored, “I totally locked my keys in my car outside. I have a job interview in Atlanta in an hour, and I’m short on cash to hire a locksmith. Can you spot me ten bucks?” Smelling a rat, I replied (truthfully) that I didn’t have any cash on me and wished him the best of luck getting into his car.
Flash forward five minutes later. I’m wheeling my groceries out to parking lot, and I see the same guy getting into a car with an unidentified woman (presumably his girlfriend) and desperately trying not to make eye contact with me. Of course, I couldn’t resist calling out across the lot, “Dude, did you get your car unlocked?”
Embarrassed, he stammered, “Um…well, I guess it turns out that…er, it wasn’t locked after all?”
“Awesome!” I cheerfully replied. “Good luck with the interview!”
Here’s a hint, matchstick man: next time you plan to run the locksmith con, at least have the decency and common sense to park your getaway vehicle out of sight. Show your marks a little respect.
Posted by Jess | Filed Under Life in a Nutshell |
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Flash forward two hours later, and Jess sends some Nigerian guy his bank account information, certain that he will soon be the recipient of INTERWEB RICHES!!#@#
That’s why I always offer to help rather than dish out the cash. I’d be like, “Heck yeah, dude. I can break into your car in no time. Lead the way, misfortunate mister!”
And he’d be all, “Oh… well… I… uh…”
And I’d be all, “BAM! Flim-flam! Get out my face!”
See, part of the joke there is that I’m a grammar nazi. But if you didn’t know that then it’s not so funny. :T
Oh, man, that musta been so enjoyable!
Loved the title of this post by the way, the way it just rolls off the tongue.
@Chris: Um, he’s not just a Nigerian “guy.” He’s a Nigerian PRINCE. Show some respect.
@Trint: I think I’m gonna make “BAM! Flimflam!” my new catchphrase. It’s catchy.
@Techsplorer: Glad you liked the title. I’m pretty sure it’s the first time I’ve ever used the word “flummoxed” in my life. Remarkably, I use “flimflam” fairly often.