Stop, or my burrito will shoot!
Posted on April 30, 2005
School mistakes burrito for weapon, goes into lockdown. “The drama ended two hours later when the suspicious item was identified as a 30-inch burrito filled with steak, guacamole, lettuce, salsa and jalapeños.” [via]
Rollin’ like your name was Wedge Antilles
Posted on April 29, 2005
Your very own X-Wing! Bidding starts at $40,000.
Posted by Jess | Filed Under Asides, Random Musings | Leave a Comment
What about Jar Jar?
Posted on April 27, 2005
Star Wars tattoos out the wazoo. Where’s Jar Jar?
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Always the last to know
Posted on April 27, 2005
So, I’m on a surprise day off today. By “surprise,” I mean that when I began my lecture on Monday, a student raised her hand to ask if class was canceled on Wednesday.
“Uh…not that I’m aware of,” I replied.
“Wednesday is Honors Day,” she informed me. “All afternoon classes are supposed to be canceled.”
“Really?”
“Yes, really. Doesn’t anybody tell teachers these things?”
“Apparently not. Wow…no class on Wednesday. That’s honestly the first I’ve heard about this. You’re not just jerking me around, are you?”
“Nope. It’s on the university website and everything.”
“Okay, er…I guess class is canceled on Wednesday. But that means we’ll have to take time away from the final exam review I had planned for next Monday to finish the material we’ll miss.”
“Can’t you just put the lecture notes online instead?”
“No.”
As usual, I’m completely out of the loop and left looking like a dorkus-malorkus in front of the class. Anyway, the upshot of the story is that I have a surprise day off today. Woo-hoo! Unfortunately, it’s going to be spent grading essays. Aww…
Posted by Jess | Filed Under Tales from the Classroom | 6 Comments
Oh, say can you…line?
Posted on April 27, 2005
Canadian woman performing “Star-Spangled Banner” at a hockey game between Canada and United States forgets the lyrics, slips on the ice, and falls on her rear end. Link includes photos and video.
I find your lack of safety restraints disturbing…
Posted on April 27, 2005
Dark Lord of the Sith ticketed for not wearing a seatbelt.
Solo in LEGO
Posted on April 26, 2005
Life-size model of Han Solo frozen in carbonite, built entirely from LEGO bricks [via].
Most carpenters I’ve met smelled like wood shavings and Old Spice
Posted on April 26, 2005
An American couple has created a scented candle based on “biblical accounts of what Jesus smells like.” And how did Jesus smell? Saviour-tastic!
Posted by Jess | Filed Under Asides | 2 Comments
Otters: The Silent Killer
Posted on April 25, 2005
I realize that linking to Onion articles is so 1999, but this one resonated with me: “Fifth Grade Science Paper Doesn’t Stand Up to Peer Review.” Trust me, if’s funnier if you’re in academics.
Posted by Jess | Filed Under Asides | 3 Comments
Nazis. I hate these guys.
Posted on April 25, 2005
Russian circus to debut monkeys dressed as Nazis. I hear France is already drawing up its terms of surrender.
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If a vampire can teach kids how to count, surely I can teach them about politics…
Posted on April 25, 2005
There’s nothing more fun than teaching class in the middle of a thunderstorm. Take last Friday, for instance…
*massive thunderclap*
Me: Wouldn’t it be great if I could get a dramatic thunder effect every time I mentioned terrorism? I feel like The Count from Sesame Street. “One! One terrorist sneaking across the Uzbeki border! Ha ha ha ha!”
*students chuckle*
They have no idea who Carl von Clausewitz is, but at least they’re familiar with the work of Count von Count.
Posted by Jess | Filed Under Tales from the Classroom | 2 Comments
For a cable guy, he makes a pretty lousy comedian
Posted on April 23, 2005
If you could travel back through time and prevent the birth of just one member of the Blue Collar Comedy Tour, which one would it be? Personally, I’m torn between Larry the Cable Guy and Ron White.
Posted by Jess | Filed Under Pop Culture | 9 Comments
See my vest, see my vest, made from real gorilla chest!
Posted on April 23, 2005
Awesome MP3 archive of more than 100 songs from The Simpsons. Get them now before 20th Century Fox’s lawyers do!
Posted by Jess | Filed Under Asides | 2 Comments
Up, up, and away!
Posted on April 22, 2005
Brandon Routh, the new Superman:
Thoughts? Personally, I think the costume’s red elements look a little too dark, but maybe it’s just the photo. On the other hand, check out that awesome spit-curl he’s rockin’!
Posted by Jess | Filed Under Random Musings | 11 Comments
The most powerful slime-mold beetle in the free world
Posted on April 22, 2005
Entomologists debate naming a new species of slime-mold beetle after George Bush, Dick Cheney, and Donald Rumsfeld. According to the article, slime mold beetles have previously be named after Darth Vader, Hernando Cortes, and Pocahontas.
Posted by Jess | Filed Under Asides | Comments Off
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